I lost my beautiful mum in December to pancreatic cancer, it's only been 3 months so the pain is still so so raw. she was only 65 and a brilliant nan to my 10 month old son who she absolutely doted on. I look at him and kills me to think she's missing out on so much and he's gonna miss out on having a brilliant nanny!! Every day seems surreal thinking it's a nightmare I'm eventually going to wake up and everything is OK but I know it's not.The missing part and not speaking on the phone everyday is horrendously painful. Ive tried to get counselling for my local gp but unfortunately there is a waiting list of at least 6 weeks so I just wondered if anyone can I offer any advice of who has been through this awful experience of how to maybe cope a bit better or counselling groups to contact. Thanks in advance. John x