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My mom has lung cancer. She has a few weeks.

Letty
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So, my mum has cancer. We were hoping for a few more months at least, but now it's clear she maybe has a few weeks. She's going home to die. I'm going to help out. I'm going to ask work for time off. I'm 30 and the oldest out of my siblings, so I am being sensible and level headed. But truth is I'm scared and devastated. My mum is all I really have. My dad left and we don't talk. I don't really know my family. So when my mom goes, I'll be alone. I'm  jsut sad and I'm really going to miss her. I feel like she never saw me achieve anything of worth and I'm ashamed of myself.  I don't even know what I want or what I'm looking for but I guess I just don't have anyone to talk to so I joined this site on a whim.

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    Dear Letty

    The fact that you are there for your mother is the most wonderful achievement of your life. How she must appreciate you, giving up your life to help her. I am sure that she is a wonderful mum, or you would not be her carer.As she did for you, so you are doing for her. Enjoy what time you have together, talk of old times and when the time comes to part your heart will be happier.

    Good luck,you kind daughter.

    Benjamina x

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    Hi Letty,

    Please try not to be so hard on yourself - you sound like a very kind and caring daughter to your lovely Mum. I am so sorry that you are going through this and I will be thinking of you.

    Take care X

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    Always believe she has longer than you've been told or think. Don't treat her every day like you think it's the last, or she might think that too. And no matter what your mum has seen you achieve I'm sure that doesn't matter to her. You are there together and obviously love each other a lot, right now that is all that matters! Not what has or hasnt been, but how you spend this time together, and how much you remind each other of your love.x

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    Hi lefty ..my mum has got lung cancer , and last month we were told there's nothing else they can do and was given weeks to live, im gutted i love her so much and i can't bare life without her I still can't believe it .I'm too looking after my mum along with my 2 sisters my dad says he's coping but I know he isn't I've never seen my dad cry until a few weeks ago I just want everything go back to how it used it be..?my mums still here but she's detoriating fast..try to spend as much time with her as you can keep telling her you love her ..

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    Dear Letty

    my dad died from lung cancer on 6th Dec, 3 weeks before that he didn't even know he had cancer. Like you I planned to get him home and care for him but it all happened a lot quicker than we anticipated and the care package took ages to set up. I am devastated as it's only been my dad and I for many years, all I can say is try to savour every day you have left with your mum. My dad and I talked and talked and laughed together. He deteriorated very quickly over 24hrs and I now see that was bettter for him as he had a fear of being dependant, which didn't happen. It doesn't matter what you did it didn't achieve, you are there for your mum now anf that's all that matters 

    sending so much love your way 

    Julia xx

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    Hi Letty, I'm sorry to see your mum has lung cancer. I'm guessing you don't have children of your own? Your mum will of looked at you over the last 30 years and see you achieve many things in life that may not seem anything to you but she would of been proud. The fact that she has raised a loving, caring daughter will make her enormously proud of the young lady you have become. Take care and I hope you get through with the support you need x

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    Dear Letty

    Although not that old I have children of my own and everything they do is an achievement in one way or another so please don't be hard on yourself. Your mum will be proud of you. You are doing an amazing thing for her bringing her home what you are doing is one of the hardest things and to do that is an achievement on its own. Spend the time with your mum and enjoy what you have left with her making special memories. Take each day as it comes.

    Take care of your mum and take care of you too.

    Tanya

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    Hi letty I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. I wanted to reply because I am also in a similar position. My mum has also recently been diagnosed and things look bleak. The cancer is advanced and has also spread to the bones. She has been given chemo but it's palliative. I too am acted but trying to be level headed. It's so hard to know what to do, how to feel. I am finding it very hard to talk about it with my husband and friends as until you have been there I don't feel like others understand. I go through days were I feel determined to make every moment count, then other days I am finding it hard to get up, go to work and carry on. My thoughts are with you and your family. Please get in touch if you want to talk fitter Lou x

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