I'm a daughter with breast cancer (got it at 44). I have been fighting "terminal cancer" for the past 5 years and, today, am winning my battle and the cancer is firmly on the run. I also have a daughter (23) so I can partially understand your panic.

The wonderful, hopeful message I would give to you is that the treatments are improving so rapidly that this disease can sometimes be treated so successfully that even people like me (late stage 4 with secondaries throughout both lungs and liver and given "no hope" originally) might survive (5 years survival and fitter and feeling better than I ever remember feeling).

There are so many great things we can do to help ourselves feel more in control, and less hopeless, and that give us focus. I have made a web site to illustrate what I do and, although it has all been an effort, it has brought me so much pleasure. I lost weight and became fit again, and educated myself in all sorts of stuff (like mindfulness meditation, diet and regular exercise) that I never considered before I had cancer.

I'm sorry, I haven't quite answered your question, but yes I am a mum and it must be terribly frustrating not knowing what to do to help your daughter. I found that just having someone to listen when I was frightened was the most useful, someone who wouldn't get tired of hearing the same thing, and who gave me gentle encouragement.

If you're interested, you will find my website at: imnotdeadyet.today

Whatever it is that's helped me to stay alive with stage 4 cancer, even if it's just the placebo effect, its great and I want to share it.

Wishing you both all the very best.

M

Hiya my 16 year old son has an aggressive brain tumour. I hope your daughter is doing well xx