Ha ha you can't get out of cooking that easily. But then again u could always order take away if you really didn't want to cook. That's what I do x

Haha I wish. Looking on line, won't get cooker delivered til Wednesday at least, and I have as you kindly pointed out  a hob, and it has 2 ovens too!  So still has a small working oven so I guess I'll just have to cook after all.  Don't think I can manage a take away for 4 nights lol xx

Hi Deano,

Okay so you're no good at DIY but cooking for 12 people! Wow, that'd scare me.  Well done you.  I'm glad you and your family had a good weekend.  I also hope this weekend goes as well as it can go.  I know it's not the same, but when my dad died 13 years ago, it was a week before Father's Day, and that was so hard.  I wish you loads of strength.

Not been so good today, the post to Jules explains it.  I'm afraid I got angry at myself, which was wrong.  I think it's because we are now entering unknown territory what with the radiotherapy finishing.  He will have a scan just before Christmas to see if anything has worked or if it has come back yet.  Because we know it will, just don't know when.  The last scan showed either a residual or a regrowth, no one seemed to know.  

Well cooker comes Thursday and sanding down a sticking door weather permitting.  All good fun.  Take care, Mandy X

Hi Deano

Just had to respond when I saw what you are planning cooking wise.OMG!!!  I would definitely be floored by cooking for that many and would choose buffet over hot every time (plus not enough seats to put them on ha ha).

We had a family/friends dinner at the weekend but my future daughter in law had planned it for her 30th and it was cooked for us all(restaurant). Very emotional for all the right reasons (reflective too).  It's very early days for  you and the family (I am nearly 11 months a widow) but you will  be together and thats important too.

Form filling is a necessary evil (I struggled with the  emotions quite a bit during that time as hubby had made extra provisions for me which came as a surprise).  In the end I preferred not to cope and though the kids offered their help I put it in the hands of a professional and had guidancewhich took away some of the stress). My concentration can still be an issue and I just having to learn to take it day to day, week to week.  It is beginning to get a little easier but this time of year is a rollercoaster of emotions and all the 'first anniversaries'  that come along feel like hurdles to climb.  Letting the emotions out helps a bit and cannot always predict how I will react so just have to go with it.

Take care of yourself.  Jules x

Thanks Jules. Cooking was one of my wife's passions and somehow I caught the bug from her. Not that I'm anywhere near as good as she was. Never been one for paperwork but thought I would give it a bash if it gets too much I'll seek out a solicitor. I've had a couple of good days over the wekend took grandkids out etc. But yesterday I just felt so down. I do expect to have days like that so decided a while ago to enjoy the time I feel ok and just ride through the days I don't. I'm on nights this week and never been able to sleep much on them so this will probably have an affect on my emotions as the week goes on but I'll get through it if it does. Hope your ok  and keep strong 

Hi Deano

My husband used to do the occasional night work and as he travelled through different time zones on business fairly often I know he was affected sleepwise and never find it easy  adjusting  his sleep pattern. I am still unable to sleep as well as I could pre-diagnosis/loss and just have to accept that at the moment.

Emotions are fragile and when occupied, especially with the joy of the company of family it is a little easier not to over-think. I only work part time but whilst the job can be a pain in the neck I appreciate the company and understanding I have received.

Yesterday I visited my Mum who is in residential care and my daughter and youngest grandson joined me there and then came back for a spot of lunch before doing the school run (when I nipped to the gym).

Into work again today and with the eldest grandson turning 7 at the weekend will pop to see them on Sunday so some good times to look forward to.

Wishing you a peaceful week, take care Jules x

Hi Deano

Sorry to read on another thread (Brian's  story) that you are having a difficult day.  Sending a virtual hug.Jules x

Hi Deano,  I didn't see your post saying you had a bad day yesterday, I hope you are feeling better today, sending lots of support and hugs xx

Hi Deano

i was just wondering how my first forum buddy is doing these days.  Hope you are well and we can catch up sometime, hugs Mandy xx