Hi Jules, yes am sitting out back with dog having a cool drink, sat down to remember I forgot to put the wash on, oh well will do it soon.  Recycle the water via window to a big bin then it goes down the back garden to water a mandarin tree.  Yes definitely a bit of the Scot in me!!

Can understand how you feel after yesterday, nice you could spend some time with mum though.  How long are you out in the mornings at work is it 4-5 hours?

Good news re the loo .  I can understands hubby frustration at not being able to carry out these jobs any more.  When mine got upset over things like that I would get teary, but other times when he would get glassy eyed, he would say - don't get upset they are happy tears, talking about the grandkids etc.as the cancer got to the adrenal glands there were no more tears left, he couldn't cry..  He was an ex nurse and ex miner so he knew what lay ahead. Now off to get the wash on and water the veggies.  Have a good shift.virtual hugs to you too

Kathy xx

Hi Kathy

Am using my imagination and thinking of your lovely weather (we have had torrential showers this morning so got a bit damp when I went to the launderette!!). On the plus side its mild for the time of year and I still have roses blooming in the garden!  Having done the mundane chores am having a coffee break.

  I work three days 8.30 - 1.45 and to be honest it is keeping me on an even keel just now.  Due to medication and now a painful 'ulcer on his cocyx(? sp)' hubby is sleeping quite a bit .  We have nurse coming in to treat/dress it but its in an awkward area.  We are still planning our Friday evening social night out (I go out with the wife whilst hubby goes to the pub with her husband) They are friends we have had for many years and are wonderfully supportive.

We have a local artisan/farmers market this coming weekend in our local town centre (about mile walk) so am aiming to go along (great for gift ideas and yummy cheeses(though I should be watching how much of that I eat - oops).  Take care of yourself Jules

Hi Kathy

Hubby has always slept on his sides but now can only do one side (cancer growth is mainly on the righthand side and this makes it to uncomfortable to rest on).  He is finding better relief during the day by laying on the floor (rather than sitting on the chair) and is currently snoring in front of the fire even though he has the motor racing on! (I have the radio on through headphones on the laptop).

Our daughter and grandchildren visited this morning (and gave me a lift back with the shopping which was a nice surprise) so visit to market (will think of  you now when I visit the cheese-man) will be tomorrow now. I try and get out for a couple of hours each day whilst it is possible.

Hope you managed to take the dog out for a stroll and am sure the garden will be a welcome place to relax (though sounds like you enjoy 'working it').  I enjoyed the times in the summer when I could sit and read and listen to the birds.Now, following lots of rain its too soggy to do much other than look at it here!

Wishing you a relaxing weekend.  Regards Jules x

Hi Kathy

Glad you managed to 'add matter' to the compost heap and dog walking was more comfortable.  I like to be outside too (have never driven so walk when I can).  Spent two hours wondering the market/shops yesterday and bumped into friends and family doing the same! Lovely to see all the local producers showing off their wares.   Managed to keep myself from buying the cheeses (supposed to  be on limited portions because of cholesterol levels grrrrrrrr).  Our eldest grandson loves 'red cheeses' and have to keep it in the fridge for his lunch when he is coming though to be honest he will always check the fridge out before deciding!

Off to work in half an hour and hubby should have nurse popping in today so will leave him a reminder to ask about cushion.  He managed quite well yesterday so am hoping his back will  be looking a llittle better when she changes dressing.  We will see how we get on at his Consultant's appointment tomorrow but am expecting a drop in weight again (to be honest not sure where he can lose it from!!). Unfortunately he is not making much of an effort to make the most of the 'shakes' they are supplying, even though he finds them pleasant enough.  Everything is such an effort for him bless him  but we just cannot replace the loss he feels in having lost the ability to work- so hard for him.

Hope you have a good week ahead. Look after yourself.  Hugs  Jules x 

Hi Kathy

Have to say think you are really brave even going into work and that wobbles for us all just show we are 'human'.  Of course, I cannot put myself where you are yet and grieiving is a long and sometime very painful process but your forum buddies are hear to listen/support when you need us.  Goodness knows I have relied on this for over two years now and no sure where I would be without be able to 'share' with those who understand this cruel and controlling disease.  I had my wobble at the consultants this morning (strange as I usually control myself when at his appointments) but  you are right about having no control over the situations we find ourselves in and the consequent frustrations that brings.  Needless to say support worker was great at listening and hubby made no comment bless him.  Still trying the step by step coping mechanism but emotions have to be let out otherwise the 'head would burst'. Sending virtual hugs. Jules x