Hi Jack

With the hairloss it is odd but if feels almost as though the hair itself hurts and if it is this then yes it is likely to start falling out very soon.  I tend to wear my wig when I go out but at home stick to scarves.  This will make the wig last longer.  They have a normal life of 3-6 months and this is the same timescale for my hair to grow back and given that I have already had it some four months I really do not want to pay out about £250 for another wig if I can help it.

My consultant told me I was not allowed to work during my treatment because the risk of infection was far to great.  As the immune system is so compromised by the chemo a minor infection can be very serious.  I would have preferred to work for as long as I could during treatment but was not given the option.  And yes it is very boring at home all the time.

Best wishes for treatment tomorrow.

Gill

Hi jack

I just wanted to say that I've read your posts and it sounds as though you're doing a great supporting job. I had tonsil cancer last year and my husband was my rock. The only thing I would say is that he was a bit too strong as he did not get upset until the day I was told I was in remission! He said he didn't want to get upset in front of me as I had enough to deal with. I would have been fine if he'd got upset.

I hope your wife's treatment continues to go well.

Debbie

Hi Jacksnakes

Sorry I've been a bit elusive but I've been reading your posts and I was wondering how your wife was getting on? How did work go for her?

I don't think I could have worked after Chemo and I only had 1 session so that makes me feel she is tougher then you think.

I have to have more and my poor old hair will fall out again bless it.

Anyway you keep up the amazing work you are doing and all the very best.

Dor x

Got a text just then on my phone... "Hair is starting to fall out "

I suppose you know it is coming but is quite upsetting when it does...

She is a little bit upset.

She went back to work on Tuesday. I got her a pair of golf gloves - she works with wire and we didn't want it piercing her skin. She was a little self-conscious about her chest and her hair - less so her hair since most people don't seem to realise it is a wig she has on, but she was worried her workmates (both of them...) would stare. I said it is only natural when people know you have had surgery to want to look to see what is different. If I tell people I have metal implanted in my legs, or that one is shorter than the other, the first thing they will do when I walk is look at my legs, so it is perfectly normal for people to be intrigued. They are not looking down on you, or feeling pity, or anything else - they just want to see if anything is different than usual. Once they have satisfied their curiosity the event is over and life goes on.

She gets tired, but again that was expected. She feels sick much less than she did, which is a major bonus. I couldn't bear to see her feeling so bad. Next one is 5th June so at least we know what to expect. Symptoms may be as severe but possibly not more so, which will be good. Now that she knows what to expect, the psychological side of things should get a lot better. Unfortunately, Debbie, I am not quite as good at keeping my emotions in check and they did surface on a couple of occasions - we had a few cries together but it is usually in the knowledge that everything is going to be okay. Seeing her upset is so painful for me and seeing her crying on the floor because she couldn't put the shopping away tore me apart - but she is doing good and I have no doubt she will keep on doing good. This will not be over for us until mid-October I would imagine - chemo finishes on 28 August, then we have three weeks I suppose before she recovers from that, then the expanders will be taken out a week or three after that and the implants put in. She is a strong wee thing, but this is a lot for one person to cope with. Work is proving tiring but therapeutic. We'll get there.

It's a long road but we've been down long roads before. We are just hoping that when we reach the end of this particular journey, it doesn't turn into just a rest-stop...

Hi Jack

Am glad she is doing ok and you are quite right about people looking - it is just to see if there is any noticeable difference.

With the chemo they normally say cycle 1 knocks you for six because it is so alien to your body.  Cycles 2 3 and 4 are not as bad but that sometimes with cycle 5 and mostly with cycle 6 it is worse because of the cumulative effect.  As you say she now knows what to expect and this does make it easier to deal with.  She is really lucky with the nausea but it is something that I had each time until cycle 5 but it got less and less and lasted a shorted period of time each cycle.  It began with lasting almost all of the three weeks and gradually reduced and by cycle 5 did not suffer at all.  The normally prescribe plenty of anti nausea drugs to combat this.  If she does not get them on one cycle just ask for them and they will get it organised.  They tend to assume that after cycle 3 they are not likely to be needed but this is by no means the case for everyone.  I know one person who felt sick until about 4 weeks after her final cycle but she is the only one.  With most it does get better with each cycle.

It is not unusual for partners to breakdown occassionally and it show just how much you care.  It is better than those who cannot show their feelings at all which can make it very hard to deal with.  You will both get through this and may well be stronger because of it.

Believe me you will be surprised at how quickly mid October comes around.  It seems like only a few weeks ago I was given my treatment plan and I am back at work next week.

Best wishes.

Gill

Thanks Gill. Sites likes this and people like you and the other contributors have been invaluable to us - I cannot imagine what it would have been like with just the two of us and little or no information about what we may face. She has been taking the anti-nausea stuff and it has worked to a large extent so pretty good there. Her tastes in food and drink have changed - she was a coffeeholic at one time and can't touch the stuff now. She just phoned five minutes ago and sounded bright as a button, which made me really happy and looking forward to getting home from work tonight

Hi Jack

Pleased to hear the anti-nausea meds are working.

As to changing tastes coffee was one of the few things that did not change for me.  Just as well becuase I do not like tea or hot chocolate.

Really  pleased to her she sounded as bright as a button.

Gill

Hi,

I've been following this thread for a while, but it is slightly outside my experience. For what it is worth, I had similar issues with taste when I was on chemo - everything tasted either bland or a bit sickly and I was pretty nauseous much of the time despite taking domperidone. As a coffee-holic I suspect I may have gone through caffeine withdrawal as coffee suddenly started to make me retch!

I came off chemo in January and within two or three weeks my taste was almost back to normal. 5 months on it seems like a bad dream, the downside is that I've put on half a stone as I can no longer resist temptation!

Best wishes

Dave

thanks Dave It is helpful to know it will all be business as usual soon enough