Hello Alan, 

I am sorry to hear about your oesophageal cancer diagnosis - you seem to have a great attitude and being a stoical person is certainly helpful in times like this. Unfortunately and you made me laugh when you called it "Uncle Google Research", that Uncle Google will never help with giving you answers and clarity or reassurance but instead is really good at throwing even the most stoical or upbeat person off balance. With your wife being on holiday at the time, you must have felt rather vulnerable. It was very thoughtful of you to be nervous about telling her - it is hard to tell loved ones news that we know will make them sad and I hope that you are both ok now and keeping strong together. 

Telling children and grandchildren is by no means easy and this is something many members of our community will have faced before too. We have valuable information on our website to help you talk to children about cancer which I hope you will find inspiring. You seem to be a very thoughtful person worrying about the effects your diagnosis will have on your loved ones and sometimes it is nice just to come here on Cancer Chat and talk to fellow sufferers who have been in a similar position before. I hope that you will meet others who have been diagnosed with oesophageal cancer and that they will be along shortly to share their experience with you. I thought I would mention to you this recent thread which caught my attention and which might be of interest to you. Amandavin posted about her husband's diagnosis and like you has been scared by what she has been reading so you could potentially support one another and share experiences as you are both going through this new diagnosis at the moment. 

Keep strong Alan and don't hesitate to come here anytime you want to offload or talk to others who understand what you are going through, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

My husband had this diagnosis recently too. They have done loads of tests but the latest Multi Disciplinary Meeting has been postponed for a week! At which stage of the diagnostic part are you?

Took a while to get any information from my PET scan, left phone numbers etc, eventually had an appointment a week ago, expecting to go and be told, I needed surgery etc, only to be told, surgery was out of the question and I was terminal, I looked over at my wife and could see the shock on her face, seeing the Oncologist tommorow, we left the hospital in a daze, surely as good practice a counsellor should be available there and then, I had no symptoms apart from a little pain,gall bladder area, no choice now but to battle on, love and big hugs to all

Hi Alan,

I’ve been there and it really stinks. The way I received my own diagnosis was a good example of how not to do it. 
Forget Dr Google, the Internet is full of conspiracy theories and outdated data.
An awkward question - did they use the word “terminal” or did they say “incurable” or “inoperable”? I only ask because these often get confused and conflated.

Best wishes 

Dave

Good luck for tomorrow. 
Determned and obstinate sounds like a requirement. 

Tx davek, all the best to you mate