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Empty terminal cancer

Damagedsoul
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Hi I'm new to this page I have stage 4 metastatic estrogen breast lymph node bone and lung cancer.Really don't know what to say my head is in a really dark place.Can't face the world panic attacks and anxiety missing hospital appointments ignoring the phone.I'm just so scared to attend appointments in case it's travelled.I can't bear to look in mirror as before I was stage 4 I had a mastectomy my breast removed.Told they had got rid of it.Boom 2 years later lump under my arm its back with a vengeance.Feel cheated empty alone unwomanly hate the world.I'm a mum to 4 beautiful children and Nan to two beautiful grandchildren.Since finding out this news nothing can hurt me nomore.I came to this page hopefully looking to chat someone that understands.I started chemotherapy which was so intense as due to e sterogen before chemo a needle has to be placed in my leg for 5 mins.Then chemo 1st time had a major reaction so was stopped which will always stick with me.Second time I lost my hair after two rounds.I stoped treatment as dramatic weight loss made me really ill.So sorry for big intro that's me.But do please get in touch and thank you for reading.

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  • Hi there,

    Welcome to Cancer Chat. I'm so sorry to hear of how you are feeling - you are dealing with a lot and it must be so much to process and incredibly difficult. I'm glad you've found the forum - I hope that it can be a helpful and supportive place for you, to write things down and reach out to others. It looks like you've had some replies from others to your other posts which is great.

    This is a very understanding community of people, and hopefully it can help you during this time.

    If ever you feel you'd like additional support or someone to talk to, have a look at Macmillan and Maggie's, who have helplines, some helpful resources and also local centres.

    Do keep taking care of yourself as much as possible, including by speaking to others around you. Hopefully all this can help you to find the strength to attend your appointments.

    Take things slowly, and remember we are always here if you need it. We also have a nurse helpline if you'd like to talk things through with one of our nurses. You can reach them on freephone 0808 800 4040 - Monday-Friday, 9-5 (excluding bank holidays, and also closed as a one-off this Thursday 9th May).

    Wishing you all the best,

    Ben
    Cancer Chat Moderator

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