HI Jan,

A very warm welcome to our forum.

It sounds as if you have had a pretty rotten year. I am glad to hear that you are a positive person and that you have plenty of support around you. Unfortunately, the way you feel now is normal, A cancer journey equates to the biggest rollercoaster ride you're ever likely to encounter - up oner minute and down the next. You have come through a lot in the last 8 months, and you must have felt really downhearted to discover that the cancer was back, less than 2 months later. I am glad to hear that you are recovering well from your recent lumpectomy and it is reassuring to hear that your lymph nodes were clear.

I have had 2 bouts of breast cancer too. I had a lumpectomy for the first and a double mastectomy for the second bout, a year later. Like you, I was assured of a good outcome with the first bout. I took Tamoxifen for a year after that, but when we discovered that this hadn't worked, I changed to Letrozole for 6 and a half years. that was all 14 years ago and I still lead a busy life.

I felt like you do now to after surgery and became terrified of getting a third bout, but I attended a number of courses on moving forward, exercise, etc and this helped me to regain my positivity. I also had some counselling, which was a great help. Perhaps you might find it helpful to attend a charity like Maggie's to chat to others, where you'll discover that you are not alone in this?

I sincerely hope that your treatment is more effective this time.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine

Thank you for your reply.

Yes I am looking into all the above you have mentioned. I will definitely be visiting Maggies again, only been a couple of times but enjoyed it.

Xx 

Hi Jan,

Have you used Maggies counselling services, or availed of their alternative therapies? There are a number of other cancer charities dotted around the country which offer similar services. We formed a self-help group after our pain management course finished and this was very helpful too.

I wish you every success with your fight and I'm sure that your strength and positivity will return given time.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Have just joined the forum today and what your feeling is exactly the same for me. It's nice to see I am not the only one feeling detached. Thanks for posting.

Have just completed 6 months of TCHP chemo, it's been a rough battle. I had surgery in December and have been told all removed tissue was negative for cancer. I also had 17 lymphnodes removed. 

Having been in survival mode and in/out hospital APTS for so long, I dont know how to transition back to my previous life but feel that's what everyone is expecting me to do. 

Radiotherapy is scheduled to start in February so feel in a bit of "in-between" phase and think I am finally processing what's happened. 

Sending you lots of positive vibes for your cancer journey. 

Hi Kaz,

A very warm welcome to our forum.

I am sorry to hear that you feel like this too. I don't think that we ever really transition back to our previous life. Cancer leaves its' mark on all of us and the best we can hope for is a fulfilling life post cancer. It does sound as if a lot has happened for you, in a short space of time and you are only now able to "draw breath" and process it. You have your "battle scars". Stand up to them, wear them with pride, as they show what a positive person you are. Have you tried joining any classes or courses for moving forward? It sounds as if this may be something for you to try, once you've got the radiotherapy out of the way.

I hope that all goes well with your radiotherapy. Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Thanks for reply, I was lucky enough to have a fantastic Macmillan centre attached to the hospital. They have been so helpful with sharing the news with my children and supporting family members caring for me. 

I am booked to attend "moving forward" workshop run through Breast Cancer Now - hoping that will help process and move forward positively. 

Hi, yes it is such a bizarre situation and strange part of the journey.

Good luck with your radiotherapy xxx

Hi Kaz,

I am glad to hear that you are already booked on a Moving Forward course and I hope that this will help you. Breast Cancer Now offer a number of useful courses, which you will hear more about when you attend this course. Take advantage of as many of them as you need to.

Don't forget to keep in touch and let us know what, if anything you get from these courses. Not enough people know about or use these fantastic facilities and talking about them here, helps others to get to know about them too - that's what this forum is all about - helping one another.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx