Hello sharkmarrison, 

I am so sorry to hear that your partner has been diagnosed with cancer in the left hand side of the colon and I hope that he won't need to wait too long for his CT scan and that it will shed some light on what is going on and whether it has spread. I really hope that you get some answers soon. It's completely understandable that you are feeling in limbo at the moment and you are doing the right thing in trying to be positive rather than anticipating the worst case scenario. Dr Google can be our worst enemy sometimes so avoid if you can looking things up online or it will only make you more anxious. Stick to reliable resources like Cancer Research UK's information page on bowel cancer. There are also helpful tips on this page to help you cope while waiting for important news. 

It's great that your partner is managing to keep strong but don't feel bad because you are finding it harder yourself and it's making you upset - it's totally understandable as you seem very close and it sounds like you love each other very much and are a great source of support to one another both at work as you have a business together and at home. It just shows how close you are that he has been so open and honest about how he is feeling which can be really hard after a cancer diagnosis. It's normal to feel that your world is falling apart and that there is a bit of uncertainty at the moment especially as the news has just hit you and you don't yet have the full details of the diagnosis. How moving that he keeps apologising to you for putting you through this - all this shows the strength of your love and it sounds like whatever the details of the diagnosis together you are strong and united despite these tough circumstances. 

I completely understand that you want to wait until you've had the scans and all the test results before you tell your families and friends. You first need to process all this together and have all the information at hand before sharing it with others. 

Writing things down here is a good way of putting into words this wave of emotion you've been feeling and I hope this will help you feel better as it has helped so many members of our community before. You are definitely not alone and I hope you will hear from others who have also supported a loved one after a cancer diagnosis and that they will be along  shortly to share their story with you.  

I thought I would also share with you this section from our website for family, friends and caregivers. You will find there useful tips to help you support someone with cancer and also information to help you also take care of yourself during this stressful time. 

Keep us updated if you get a moment on what the CT scan reveals. We'll be thinking of you in the coming days and keeping everything crossed for you and your partner.

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi, I'm in exactly the same position as you were 6 months ago.  How did you cope?  My husband is so positive and I'm absolutely broken.  I can't eat, sleep,do anything......I'm terrified of losing him.  He's all I've got and my best friend.

I hope things are going ok for you x

Hello! 

I’m so sorry to hear of your partners news. It’s so hard and you feel like your world is crumbling when you first get the news. Try not to over think things (easier said than done right?) 

Have you got a good support network around you? Do you know what the next steps will be for his treatment? 

I feel like we have been so lucky. 

He was diagnosed with Stage 3 bowel cancer. He had an operation in November and they managed to removed all the cancer. It had spread to his lymph nodes so he has just completed 4 rounds of chemo. We saw his oncologist yesterday and he’s happy with everything so he’s now back to being under the care of the surgeon for the next 5 years to make sure nothing comes back. 

I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but it does get easier and you just have to take each day as it comes and try to remain positive. 

if you ever need to chat please feel free to message me xx

Hi Sharkmarrison

Thank you so so much for that.   I'm so glad your partner is on the mend.  I think it's the old "as soon as I hear cancer I hear Death Sentence".  What you have said has certainly helped put my mind at rest a little.  I thought Stage 3 onwards could not be sorted but you have given me a bit of hope. 

There's an MDT tomorrow where he will be discussed and then hopefully Tuesday we will get to see the consultant and see what stage he is at and what they are planning to do.  I saw the pics of the tumour and it looked massive but then I had to tell myself that its magnified.

The NHS have been absolutely amazing and moved so swiftly.  Can not fault them.  Also his nurses have contact us almost every other day just to see how we are getting on.

I look at him and there's no difference in him, no symptoms....in fact he's eating like a horse and he's walking about 10 miles everyday for Cancer UK with our German Shepherd pup. He's had no blood and no pain so I guess those signs are good.

I'm just so scared I'm going to lose him.  He's all I have got......other than the dog :)  I've lost so many people to this awful disease I suppose I saw the worst case scenario before I could even think about it.

You've helped a lot so thank you for that x