Hi Leesaraccoon,

A very warm welcome to our forum,

I am sorry to hear about your mother's diagnosis. It is difficult to say how much chemo will take out of her, as it varies from one person to the next. The worst time for most people seems to be a few days after treatment. She is likely to feel very tired and may feel nauseous, although the sickness can be helped by medication. She may also go off certain foods. The best advice you can get is from her chemo nurses, as they have all of her medical details to hand. 

I do hope that she will cope well with her treatment and that she can manage to stay at home throughout.

Please keep in touch and let us know how she gets on. We are always here for both of you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Jolamine, 

Thank you for your kind words. Her first treatment is on 4th July. I've said that we will all be governed by her and what she wants at all times. I know she doesn't want to be a burden (she could never ever be that) but I  have offered that she comes to stay with us if it gets too much. Obviously I've googled oh so much about treatment but it never gives you the personal feelings of the patient. She may just want to be on her own sometimes I don't know. 

As I say, she's old school, don't let people know how you truly feel. 

Once again thank you for your reply xx 

Hi Leesaraccoon,

Google can give a skewed account of any medical condition or treatment. The ones who sail through chemo don't usually write about it, so it's the more spectacular cases that get more attention. It is good that she wants to remain independent, but also good that she knows that she can fall back on your offer, if she needs to.

It's not long now until her treatment starts and I hope that it goes as well as possible for her.

Please keep in touch and let us know how she gets on and remember that we are always here for both of you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi there, 

I had weekly chemo (paclitaxel) at the start of the year, and I did find it quite tiring (although I didn't really have any other symptoms with it, so that felt like a win!). I also live on my own, although my partner was here every weekend, and it was things like cleaning, ironing, gardening and changing the bedding that I really struggled with, so my advice would be to try and help with those things if you can. 

I know a lot is said about ready meals, but I managed to find some that were as healthy as possible and included some veg portions, as standing to cook was also just a bit too much. 

I'm also very independent and accepting/asking for help wasn't something I am used to or like doing, but it honestly made the world of difference. Needing support whilst going through something like this isn't something to feel ashamed of. If you get worried, it might be worth speaking to the nurses to see if they can have a conversation around accepting help, so it isn't coming from you?

I hope that helps, and that your mum doesn't have too many side effects. Please also make sure you have the support you need at the moment too :) xx

Amy,

Thank you. This has reassured me a lot. I hadn't thought about the day to day chores. She still seems fairly upbeat about the whole process but as we haven't started the treatment yet its fear of the unknown. I've started with the things we need soonest. She has an appointment for a wig tomorrow as she says she won't be seen without hair outdoors! 

We've been considering a personal alarm and she thinks this is a good idea. The consultant was insinuating in his telephone consult that she may be very weak and prone to falls. I'm not sure whether that was said as worst case scenario.  

As I said we will be governed by her. As for me, my husband is very supportive for us both bless him.

Anyway, importantly, how are you? Have you finished chemo? I hope things are going well for you xx