How do i cope

Me and my dad have had a troubled relationship but Ive just found out my dad has pancreatic cancer he has a few months left and i dont know how to deal with it im at work i cry at home i cry i just dont know how to deal with it and just get on with out crying all the time.

  • So sorry for your news, I've recently lost my mum after a very short battle with cancer , I think it's normal to cry all the time at least I did, it's a shock, all you can do is try and support your dad despite the troubled relationship, there are people you can talk too, st lukes we're very good and offered all our family support as well as mum mum x

  • Hi. It's so heart wrenching to read upset and I absolutely feel the pain through all the words..  My. Mum is being tested. We haven't been told results are 100 per cent cancerous.. But all symptoms seem to be putting us in this road.. I've done nothing but cry n cry until my face is sore.. I'm thinking we have to dig deep and find some strength with in us to just be there be thier support and not regret anything we do from this day..   Keep talking to friends and ur family. 

     

  • Im sorry to hear that ..i find thats the worst bit the limbo wether in your case of not knowing yet or mine ahaving the timeline and wondering which day will take them,i think thats my biggest struggle is i have no one to offload to i hadnt spoke to him in nearly 4 years then got a random message with details and told i best see him ,as soon as he opened the door i knew it was bad ,he doesnt want everyone knowing and theres only a select few of his side of the family that know all of which i dont talk too because well both sides of my family seem to be as toxic as each other ,i never thought id learn something like this and thatd itd hit me this hard but its tearing me apart 

  • Thank you for the reply,i know its a cliche thing to say and sometimes it doesnt help but im truly sorry for your loss,i really struggled this morning at work hearing certain words really hit me hard unfortunately i cant change that ,thank you for your kind words and advice x

  • Do u feel bad now for the break down of yours relationship for that long and that's playing on your mind too .. It's alot to deal with and there's sometimes no bloody answers is there... 

    I think you should spend time together when you can and don't think about what's gone or what's to come.. Have your dad back in your life.... 

    I'm just going over to my mums to cook her tea. She's got a broken wrist too for chrust sake.. Lol..  Bubble wrapping her up I think x

     

  • I think we both could of tried harder, and i know theres probably guilt from my side,if only everything came with an instruction manual ...

    Oh no bless her at least she has you to be a maid for her hope her wrist heals well x

  • Honestly....im struggling i collapsed at work everyone around me thinks im nuts/stupid etc because why am i crying over a man who was never there for me or couldnt be assed slowly the i feel like the people around me are dwindling away  because they think i shouldnt be that bothered by it 

  • Don't consume yourself with over thinking what work colleges think.. Emotions can never be straight forward..  You need to make sure your taking care of your self.. Eating drinking..??    Sending hugs..