In July whilst FaceTiming I noticed a large on my right side of neck so followed nhs guidelines and kept an eye on it for a few weeks. 6 weeks after first noticing it there was no improvement so I made an appointment to see the gp- I didn't realise it would be 7 week wait to get a face to face appointment or in hindsight I would have made the appointment when I first noticed it , however at 49 years of age this was the first time I have needed to see a gp other than when I've been expecting a baby. My gp was great, sent a referral to lump clinic at ENT clinic and sent me for blood tests. Since then everything has been a complete whirlwind and I have no clue what is going on and because things are going on so fast I am more anxious about everything. Within 2 week of my referral I saw ENT consultant, 1 week later had an ultrasound, 2week after had needle biopsy, 2 week later consultant team member told me suspicious cells so would be having a hemi thyroidectomy the beginning of January, but the following day from speaking to consultant I received a phone call wanting me in for hemi thyroidectomy the next week(which I couldn't make)so had it 10 days from being told I was needing one - I had that done Tuesday and am home recovering but feeling completely overwhelmed and in the dark as to what is going on and what is happening. I read these forums and everyone seems to know so much about what their lump is,like there's a code describing it all , but I feel like I am literally walking around in complete darkness as if I have missed out on some important conversation because even when I received the suspicious cells result from ENT she spoke to me as if I had already been told that's why I was there and she was just getting me ready for the operation. I really am feeling alone and worried about it all, family /friends tell me it's great they've operated quickly but I keep thinking why have they done this so quick especially when I was told operation would be around 6 weeks time, also having the operation when nurses were on strike made me feel like it was urgent. The hardest thing is I'm having to put on a front that all is well because I need to be fine for my children and  husband cos I see the worry and scared look in their faces (especially my husband who wells up if I rub my neck). I am actually relieved it is Christmas Day tomorrow because I figure I won't receive any phone calls this week telling me I need to go back and have another operation or something, but also because im on Christmas break from work I now have time to think about what is going on and to realise how little I know and how little information I have received - I assumed my blood test results would be uploaded onto my nhs app but nothing is on there not even referral to ENT or any of the hospital appointments. 

I'm not sure really what I expected from this posting except that I feel offloading it somewhere has helped me in a way to clarify the mess going around in my head. I know that most thyroid cancers are curable , I guess I just feel I'm swimming around not actually knowing what they think it is and whether they are working towards it being the more aggressive thyroid cancer purely because it all seems so rushed to me.

Thank you for the opportunity to air my worries, even posting this is difficult as to choose a category I don't feel I fit in the newly diagnosed/ nor the pre diag signs & symptoms. I'm in limbo, not knowing where I fit but burdened with the worry of ifs/buts , children/finances, working/taking time off, what happens next and what is going to happen.