Hi Yyvey, 

I just wanted to welcome you to the Cancer Chat community and offer you my deepest sympathies for your loss.

To lose someone you loved so dearly in such a short space of time must be so, so, tough. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult this must be but I'm glad you've joined us as some of our members, sadly, have gone through this as well so you are not alone and hopefully you will receive some kind words and advice from them soon.

Grief can be so overwhelming, but there are many organisations and support groups that can help. Cruse provides bereavement counselling and offers support and information to anyone who has been bereaved. The Loss Foundation aims to support people through their bereavement and connect you with others who have experienced something similar and Sue Ryder has an online bereavement service that offers free and professional video counselling. They also have an online forum just like ours where you can talk to others in a similar situation.

Your GP will be able to offer you support as well but if you ever find things becoming a little bit too much or you just need to talk to someone when no-one else is around, then the Samaritans are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week on 116 123.

Be kind to yourself Yyvey and for the moment, just take things one step and day at a time.

Kind regards,

Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi Yvey,

I am so sorry to hear about your husband and offer my sincere sympathy on your loss. You are not not  alone in the way you feel. I know that this is no consolation when you have lost your soul mate. We lost my father-in-law under similar circumstances. He died just 5 days after diagnosis. Somehow or other, when someone is ill for a while, we have some time to come to terms with an impending loss, but it is all the harder when it happens so quickly.

Do you have any family or friends who you can turn to for support? I see that our moderator, Steph, has mentioned a number of places that you can turn to for support. Please don't be afraid to avail of any of these services. Sometimes it is easier to talk to a stranger about our emotions than it is to talk to our loved ones.

First anniversaries after losing someone special are especially difficult. Having Christmas thrust upon you so soon after your loss, must have felt especially difficult and lonely. It will take time to come to terms with everything that has happened. Rest assured that things will improve with time. Sadly, I cannot say how long this will take, as we all process grief differently. Try not to look too far into the future for now. Take things day by day or even hour by hour if need be.

My thoughts are with you and I am always here if you want to talk.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx