I am so sorry about your dad. It's the hardest thing to go through. Sounds very similar to my Mam in respect of digging his heels in. We were told my mam had a few months left and within 10 days she had passed away. But she went downhill so quickly, the nurses were amazing with her and they came out and said that she would be sleeping all the time in the end, stop eating and not walking but that was totally not the case with my mam. She was so confused in the last few days but she had moments of humour, she was eating chocolate the day before she passed and we took her out in her wheelchair into the back garden for some sun and even the morning of the day she passed she was trying to get out of bed. She was in a lot of pain so we asked the Macmillan nurses to come out and they gave her as much pain medication and anxiety meds as they could to calm her down and she eventually went to sleep and then her breathing changed and that's when she went in her sleep. My mam didn't sleep much at all before this, we think because the nurses said at the end she will sleep all the time she said that scared her so much that she always fought her sleep. She had a catheter in but would wake up every hour and demand she needed a wee and wouldn't stop until we got her out of her and put her on the comode. My dad and me slept downstairs through the night to be there if she needed anything, I think she thought she was fighting it but getting out of bed all the time. We just knew that morning that it was going to happen by the change in her breathing so we got the whole family to come and they were all there. In a way I am glad she didn't suffer for months on end but I wish I could have 1 last conversation with her as one day she woke up and was so confused and we didn't expect it. Thinking of you and your dad x 

Thank you for taking the time to share your experiences and sorry you've both had to go through these things.  I lost my mum a couple of years ago so do have some experience of how this can pan out but I can already see that 2 experiences can be very different. 
 

Difficult day today - very confused and agitated / frustrated.  Having to have the same things explained over and over again. Difficult to see. At that selfish point of just wanting this to be over, it's so cruel at this stage. The positives are few and far between 

Another difficult day yesterday.  Asleep for huge periods of time but so, so confused when awake.  Thinks he is going mad, thinks people are spying on him.  Insistent that he is ok and doesn't need help.  Resistant to taking medication, believing that's what's making him feel this way, not the illness.  
really struggling with the red tape around medical aspect.  Professionals disagreeing on medication.  Having to go through the steps of trying various things first before moving on to the next level of medication even though we know him well enough to know that it's not going to work.  
 

Exhausting 

Another difficult day yesterday.  Asleep for huge periods of time but so, so confused when awake.  Thinks he is going mad, thinks people are spying on him.  Insistent that he is ok and doesn't need help.  Resistant to taking medication, believing that's what's making him feel this way, not the illness.  
really struggling with the red tape around medical aspect.  Professionals disagreeing on medication.  Having to go through the steps of trying various things first before moving on to the next level of medication even though we know him well enough to know that it's not going to work.  
 

Exhausting 

Hi [@WhoNeedsSleepAnyway]‍ 

I am so sorry to hear about your dad.The title of this conversation made me click it, as my mother is in her final weeks and has been for the past 2 months.I am trying to look for symptoms of it being days but whenever I find some and I think that's the end, she recovers for another week. She has deteriorated so much and behaves like a baby - unable to use a spoon or a mug - and it's so hard to see her like this and as much as I like the idea of her still being around, seeing her like this for so long is so exhausting. 

H‍ow are you doing? How is your father doing?

Thank you

Diana