Hi,my mum was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer just over 18months ago, she also has it in her lymph nodes and rib,she has had immunotherapy and radiation therapy,she seemed to pic up a little bit,but now she is in a lot of pain and lost loads of weight, last few days she has spent most of it in bed, she in 40 mg morphine twice a day plus the liquid when needed, the consultant said he is considering cemo but thinks the side effects would be too much, can anyone tell me if this could be the end or could she pic up again,im at a loss as to what to expect 

Hi Loo1512, I'm sorry to hear that. I can't really help on what could happen next. I know Jolamine will be able to help you more. From my experience with my mum once you are too weak for treatment it usually means that there isn't too much more they can do. I know everybody is different though. Try and savour every moment you can with your mum. All the time you can spend together is special. My thoughts are with you and your mum. X

Simon 

Hi Jolamine, I'm sorry to hear that. I hope they can get his blood pressure sorted out. It's so difficult when changing tablets isn't it, my dad is like that when they start new medications, it's always difficult to make sure something else doesn't go wrong. I do hope the ecg goes well and they can help him.

Yeah they did warm us thst the tiredness can happen at any time, I think they said the first 3 weeks there's a good chance of some symptoms. I know these can happen at any time though. It is strange that it's just a waiting game now and hopefully there's some good news down the line. Thank you Jolamine, yes he has been fine since then. 

I'm glad you did get a little bit of the hot weather finally! I believe we will all be hot this weekend. There's a warning for very hot weather so hopefully you do get some sun! Thanks Jolamine, I like a bit of sun but that does sound too hot for me! I hope your husband feels better soon Jolamine. You take care. x

Simon

Hi Simon,

I hope that your Dad is doing ok and that he doesn't have too many nasty symptoms. I sincerely hope that he gets some good news when he goes back to the hospital.

We have finally had a few days of continuous hot days, intersperced with light showers and accompanied by a strong wind. This has made the heat bearable. Admittedly our weather is still only in the low 30ies, so nothing like I expect that you have. I hope that you're coping ok.

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, I hope you are well. Sorry for the late reply. My dad has been doing ok thank you. He has been tired but has been lucky so far with not too many symptoms. Thank you Jolamine, It will be a while before we find out but hopefully it's good news.

Ah that's good, I'm glad you have finally had some nice weather. It was pretty awful last week, far too hot. Once it gets past 30 it's getting too hot for me! How is your husband doing Jolamine, I hope he's feeling a little better. You said he has a appointment at the end of the month didn't you, I hope that goes well. You take care Jolamine. x

Simon

Hi Simon,

I'm delighted to hear that your Dad is doing ok. It is great to hear that he hasn't got too many side-effects, apart from the tiredness. It's now an anxious wait to find out how successful his treatment has been.  As you say, this may take a while but let's hope that it will be good news.

The highest temperature we reached here was 34º, so nothing like the temperatures that you've been having - and this only lasted for one day. Hubby is still not doing well. The heart failure nurse came out to see him when his blood pressure was so low. She was very thorough. She took his blood pressure, discovered that he has an irregular heart beat, took various blood tests and phoned to tell me the results the following day. She said that she would arrange another ECG for him. She then advised him to reduce one of his tablets and said that she would phone back the following week to see how he was coping. Unfortunately, she never phoned back.

I haven't phoned her back, because he has an appointment with the heart failure nurse at the hospital tomorrow, so we'll see what she has to say tomorrow.

Look after yourself Simon.

Regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, how are you. Yes he is doing ok so far, just fingers crossed now for when he gets the results. I believe they will be in contact next month so we still have a little wait. I'm so sorry to hear your husband is having these problems. How did the appointment go? My dad has an irregular heart beat, he has had heart disease for a while though. I know there is a medication he takes so they can get it under control. Hopefully they can find out what's going on with you husband and try to help. I know it must be stressful for you. It's frustrating isn't it when someone   doesn't ring back, I know they are busy but it does leave you in limbo not knowing what to do. 

I'm glad you did finally get some nice weather! It's been ok here, not a lot of rain which is about as good as we can ask for! I hope the weather has been good for you too. I hope you are managing ok Jolamine. I wish your husband all the best and hope they can help him feel better. You take care of yourself Jolamine. x

Simon

Hi Simon,

Sorry for the delay in replying. I have been away with the family for a few days. It was lovely to catch up with my granddaughters, who have matured so much in the past year - it's sad to see them growing up so quickly!

I am delighted to hear that your dad is doing ok so far, although it will be an anxious wait to see  what his results are. Hubby has had heart trouble for the past 26 years. He first had stents inserted, but they didn't work and he had a quadruple by-pass 26 years ago. He also has diabetes, vascular dementia and vascular Parkinson's, so he is on a lot of medication. His legs were getting very swollen, so his medical team added a new tablet, which seems to have reduced the swelling, but is causing all sorts of additonal symptoms. They have adjusted the doseage of two of his other tablets, but so far, this has just raised other problems. We were back at the hospital just before we went away and saw the heart failure nurse again. She has adjusted his meds again and arranged for him to have an ECG there and then, as he still has an irregular heart beat. We'll see her again shortly.

I am hoping and praying that you get good news when you get the results back.

Regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, Ah that's nice. I hope you had a good time! Yeah time does go so fast, my sister has 3 sons and everytime I see them they seem to have got a lot bigger! It must have been nice to spend some time with them. He is thank you, I'm sorry to hear that. It sounds like he is having a tough time. That's good that they have managed to control it, I know by-passes are very serious. My dad has heart disease so I do know a little about it. He's also diabetic too which always makes everything difficult. Changing a medication or anything like that is always a big deal. It sounds like they are trying to get your husbands medication just right. I'm sure they will get there but I know that's no consolation for you or him if he is struggling now. I hope he does improve and if not when you do back to see them again they can help. I know it must be very frustrating for you. 
 

Thank you so much Jolamine, I hope your husband starts feeling better soon. You take care. x

Simon

Hi Simon,

We are still struggling with my hubby's medication, but hopefully we'll get there eventually - you know what it's like. It doesn't take much to throw the Diabetes, Parkinsons' and other problems out of sync too. What ages are your nephews? They must surely be an interest for you.

I hope that your dad is continuing to feel well and that the tiredness is lessening.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, I'm so sorry to hear your husband is still struggling. Hopefully they can sort it out. I do understand how hard it is. It is a delicate balancing act when so many medications are already being taken. My dad is just the same, they don't want to do anything that might affect the medication he is already on. He is doing ok thanks, his appointment is next month so we may doing out something more then.

Yes my nephews are 14,12 and 11. I must admit I don't see them that much, they are always busy or stuck on their computers! It is always nice to see them when I can though! They also have 2 dogs which I love to see. I do want a dog at some point but I know it's an added responsibility and not the best time at the moment. I hope your husband is feeling a little better Jolamine. You take care. x

Simon

Hi Simon,

Sorry for the delay in replying. It has been a particularly busy spell. We are still struggling with hubby's health. We are still struggling with changes of medication, but haven't reached the optimum situation as yet. We managed to catch up with the family for a few days at the beginning of August, which was lovely. We saw a big change in our grandchildren. They are now 11 and 15, so like your nepnews, they are always busy with something or other. Now, we're busy planning our trip to Italy, which is only 2 weeks away. 

A dog would be great, but it is a big responsibility. They are great company, but you'll know when the time is right to get one. 

I am glad to hear that your dad is keeping ok. He should soon be getting his appointment through for this month and, I do hope that he gets some good news. Please let us know how he gets on.

I hope that all is well with you.

Regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Simon,

Sorry for the delay in replying. It has been a particularly busy spell. We are still struggling with hubby's health. We are still struggling with changes of medication, but haven't reached the optimum situation as yet. We managed to catch up with the family for a few days at the beginning of August, which was lovely. We saw a big change in our grandchildren. They are now 11 and 15, so like your nepnews, they are always busy with something or other. Now, we're busy planning our trip to Italy, which is only 2 weeks away. 

A dog would be great, but it is a big responsibility. They are great company, but you'll know when the time is right to get one. 

I am glad to hear that your dad is keeping ok. He should soon be getting his appointment through for this month and, I do hope that he gets some good news. Please let us know how he gets on.

I hope that all is well with you.

Regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, sorry hope you are well. I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you have managed to get his medication under control. I know how hard that can be. That sounds nice, I bet it was good to see them. Yeah they really do grow fast, everytime you visit them they seem to have shot up even more! I'm sure your grandchildren are the same, they do grow so quickly.
That sounds really nice, I hope you have a good trip. I'm guessing you will be going in the next few days. Have a great time Jolamine!

Yes definitely, I would love a dog but know the responsibility it brings. As you said I will know when the time is right. My dad received the letter and his appointment isn't till December so there's quite a bit of a wait yet. I will of course let you know when I hear anything. Thank you Jolamine, you enjoy your trip and take care. x

Simon

Hi Simon,

Thank you for this update. Your dad must be disappointed that he has another 3 months to wait. We are still struggling with hubby's medication and, he had a nasty fall tonight. Fortunately, he doesn't seem to have broken anything, but I reckogn that he'll be stiffer and sorer than usual for a few days. We go off on Tuesday, so it's all very exciting.

I am still hopeful that your dad's treatment has been effective.

Regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, oh no I'm sorry to hear that. I hope he is doing ok and he feels better soon. Yes it is quite a bit of a wait, we expected it to be a few months but it will end up being longer than we thought. Thank you Jolamine! I hope you have a great time in Italy! Take care x

Simon

Hi Simon,

I haven't heard from you for a while, so I'm just touching base to see how you're both doing. I hope that all is well.

Regards,

Jolamine xx.

Hi Jolamine how are you. I hope your holiday went well me you had a good time! How is your husband doing?

It's not been going very well recently. My dad was getting more and more tired and after convincing him he eventually rang the doctors. He's aenamic so we thought he would be needing a blood transfusion. He has had this before. After a doctor came round they decided to take him to hospital. While they were checking they found out that the cancer has now moved to his liver. They gave him 4 blood transfusions while there but they also said to him it wasn't looking good. They said they can't give any more treatment and with all his other problems going on he has 3 months left best case scenario. He is having trouble with his kidneys and he has high fluid levels. He has managed to come home but we have had to put a hospital bed in the back room as he's not able to get up the stairs as easily now. They have set up new carers 4 times a day. These carers are much better than the last ones though. We knew he was getting more and more I'll but it's always a shock when you hear the news. How have you been doing Jolamine, I hope everything is going ok. x
Simon

HI Simon,

We enjoyed our holiday and the wedding went well. Unfortunately, it rained every day, except the day of the wedding, so we were very lucky.

I am so sorry to hear this news about your dad. You've unfortunately been here before and know what this means - I'm sure that you're dreading the next few months.

I am glad to hear that you have managed to get your dad a hosital bed and that his new carers are a big improvment on his last ones.

We are fine thank you - still struggling with hubby's many failing health problems, but otherwise ok.

I'm always here if you want to talk.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, I'm glad you had a good time. That's a shame about all the rain but at least it was fine for the important day! Im sorry to hear about your husbands problems. I know it can feel like a constant battle, my dad has been the same really. Yes I do have a rough idea what to expect after my mum, I know every case is different but I'm not looking forward to it. Then I'm thinking about when he's gone I will be on my own. I know there's too much to worry about though, for now I have to concentrate on my dad and getting though this. 
Yes they are much better which does help a lot, my dad likes them which is also a bonus as he's happy for them to help. It makes it a lot easier. 
Thank you Jolamine, that means a lot. I do hope your husband manages to get more comfortable. The clocks are back now aren't they, the dark nights and miserable weather don't help do they! You take care Jolamine and I hope your husband feels better. X

Simon

Hi Simon,

There's so much for you to think about. Having carers that your dad likes should make things a lot easier. We certainly found this with my mother-in-law. Will you be ok to live on your own, or will you have to make other arrangements?

First things first, your dad has to be your priority for now. There is certainly a big difference in the amount of daylight now. I'm still trying to tidy up my garden and between the frequent rain and dark nights, it's not easy.

I'm here any time you want to chat.

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, yes the weather hasn't been great recently has it. It's getting colder now! I'm not a big fan of it going dark so early, the days feel really short. 
Yeah there is a lot to think about, I think I will be ok on my own but it will really depend on the finances. The house was originally for a family so it's quite big for one person but I don't think I will want to move anywhere fast when he does pass away. As you said though I need to take one thing at a time. I need to get through this first and worry about that later. Thank you so much Jolamine, I really appreciate that. I hope your husband is doing ok. X

Simon

Hi Simon,

There are so many decisions to be made, but prioritise them and take one thing at a time. Hubby is slowly deteriorating, but he has given us some laughs too - It's a sad situation, but if you don't laugh, you cry.

I agree, I hate these shorter days and darker nights too. I was meant to hibernate for 3 months from this time of year!

Jolamine xx