Hi Jolamine, yes it is frightening with these constant new strains popping up. I think this is the future for now, new variations keep popping up. Is there another one already! I didn't catch that one but it doesn't surprise me, all we can do is have out jabs and try to keep safe. Sorry to hear your work stsff have been affected. It can't be easy for you or them, it's difficult for everyone at the moment I think.

I am hoping your sons operation was effective and you do get good news in the future. Yes please let me know how he is doing. It was difficult at Christmas, I imagined it would be a struggle but I just didn't have any enthusiasm for it and my dad never fusses. It was my mum that always orchestrated everything but I think that's normal. Mums do everything! I can imagine it will take quite a bit of time before getting used to it again, I know the first christmas is just the start. I guessing it will take many years before anything feels normal again. I hope everything is as well as possible for you Jolamine. Many thanks. X

Simon 

Hi Simon,

Sorry for the delay in replying.

How are you coping now that you've got your first Christmas out of the way? - It will gradually get easier, but there's no telling how long thwill take. My son's operation didn't leave him paralysed, as we were told that it might, but he is still in a lot of pain. He saw the  surgeon last week and he has advised him to wait another 6 weeks. If it is still sore then, he will carry out another MRI and, may need to operate again.

I am selling my business and hope to transfer everything by the end of this month. I am up to my eyes in paperwork at present, but will be delighted to have some more time to myself eventually.

Take care.

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, that's no problem at all. How are you doing? I'm glad your sons operation went as well as it could although I know you have to wait and see now. Hopefully it has been successful, it must be very stressful for you. It can't be gone for him if he is in pain aswell, I do hope that you manage to get him as comfortable as possible. I'm very sorry you are going through this Jolamine. I wish you and your son all the best. 
I can imagine selling your business will be keeping you very busy! Hopefully you can get it finalised and then have more tone for yourself! I imagine the paperwork will be endless with something like that! I hope you do get it sorted quick as possible!

I'm not too bad thanks Jolamine, this month has probably been the worst so far but I'm guessing it's the new year and with Christmas it was quite tough to get through. I thought I might feel a bit better but I know there no timeline, it still gets me out of the blue, I will be gone and then something sets me off but I know that's normal. I'm coping ok thank you. I wish your son well and I hope you manage to get your business sorted. Try not to do too much if possible, it sounds like you are run of your feet! You take care Jolamine! X

Simon

HI Simon,

My son went back to see his surgeon recently. The pain in his back is slightly better but it is still very sore. He has been advised to wait another 6 weeks. If no better then they will give him another MRI with a view to further surgery. 

Yes selling my practice has kept me exceptionally busy this month, but I'm hoping to hand everything over at the end of this month.

I'm glad to hear that you are still coping. I'm sure that Christmas and New Year were tough for you. Grief is a strange emotion and has no time limits. You are bound to have spells which just hit you out of the blue, but you will gradually find that you begin to accept your loss.

Thinking of you and wishing you brighter days.

Regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, how are you. I'm glad your sons back pain is a little better and I am hoping that it does continue to get better. It must be really difficult for you him. I do hope that something can be done to make him more comfortable. It sounds like this is not something that can be fixed quickly though. My thoughts are with you both. 
Ah that's good, hopefully by the end of the month you will be able to slow down a little bit and get some more time to yourself!  I can only imagine how stressful it must be to sell a business! Hopefully there are no hiccups and it all goes through for you.

Thank you, yes Christmas and new year were a bit of a non event but I expected that. The strangest thing is this has been the most difficult month since she passed. Like you said there are no rules for grief, it is a very strange thing. Some days are ok and others are awful. Emotions can change a lot, sometimes you think tut can't get through it but you do. Thank you Jolamine, I am coping ok.

Thank you for the kind thoughts. I wish all the best for your son and hope you do get some good news in the future. You take care Jolamine. X

Simon

Hi Simon,

We'll just have to give my son's back a little longer to heal before they decide to operate again. His surgeon says that he will do another MRI in 6 weeks and, if no better then, he may operate again. There is also talk of another operation to his neck following another Cortisone injection, but this shouldn't be as dangerous as his last op and wouldn't take place for another 9 months.

We are gradually getting there with the business. I should be retired by this time next week, which seems hard to believe at the moment!

I am sorry to hear that you have found January/February to have been the most difficult time since your mum passed. It is often difficult to say what triggers these - there really is no explanation at times. We get through the bad moments because we have to  - unfortunately, there are no options, but I am glad to hear that you are coping.

Thinking of you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi simon,

Sorry for the delay in replying. It has been a particularly busy time and took longer than I thought to finalise the sale of my practice. I handed it over on 3rd March and I am finding it strange to have all this extra time, but am gradually getting thins in order at home. 

It is also giving me more time with hubby and we hope to get away for a few day trips when the weather gets a bit warmer.

I am glad to hear that you are soldiering on and doing your best to make your mum proud. Have you managed to have a chat with your own GP yet? I hope that you manage to soon.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, I'm glad you finally got everything sorted. I'm sure it does feel strange but I think you will get used to it after a while. It must be nice to take it a little bit easier! That sounds good, hopefully the weather warms up a bit although it has been a little better these last few days! I'm sure you will be able to go on some nice trips with your free time now! 

I am doing ok thanks Jolamine, I did speak to the doctor finally! . He is sending me to a psychotherapist I believe to help me cope better with my condition. It's a start anyway, at least I am seeing someone rather than just waiting! I did have a bad patch this last week were my dizziness came back a lot. I think that's when it hit me most that my mum wasn't here. When you feel ill you always want your mum! I know you have to just be strong and try and make her proud. I believe that she is still here with me watching over me. 

I hope everything is ok with you, I hope your son is doing ok and is improving. I'm thinking of you both. You take care Jolamine! X

Simon

Hi Simon,

Yes, everything is sorted at last and, I'm gradually getting used to having all of this extra time on my hands. I am glad to hear that you have spoken to a doctor about your condition and that he is referring you to see a psychotherapist. Did you ask if tests had improved or whether there were any new treatments that might help you more?

I am sorry to hear that you weren't so good last week. This is definitely when you feel that you need your mum more. I still believe that my mum is with me too and I find it a great comfort to think that she is still watching over us. I hope that you are feeling better this week. My son is due to chat with his surgeon again soon to see if he feels that more back surgery might help. He is also waiting for another cortisone injection into his neck to see if that makes any difference.

Take care Simon. My thoughts are with you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx