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Mom has a terminal diagnosis

Vicky98
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I'm really just looking for someone to talk to that maybe went through or is going through something similar that I am because I feel so alone like I have no one to talk to and no one understands me...

i am 22 and my mam has a terminal diagnosis her prognosis is very poor... she's only in her early 40s... I've an older sister and 4 younger siblings youngest is 2... just so unfair that such young kids will be left without a mother... our dad is still in the picture but we've all been close with my mam and I'm just not coping with the idea of losing her, I need her, sometimes it feels like I only have her and without her I'd be left with nothing... 

would be nice to have someone to talk to really 

thanks,

vicky 

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    Vicky I am really so sorry that your mum is so sick and so young. I am 48 and was diagnosed with stage 4 kidney cancer 19 months ago. The cancer has spread to my lungs but I'm still staying positive as I have 3 kids aged 16,23 and 27 and my biggest worry is leaving them. I also lost my mum 4 years ago to kidney cancer exactly the same cancer in same kidney that I have it. However my mums cancer went to her bones and she died 10 weeks after diagnosis and I still miss her. However I am still feeling fit and well and almost 'normal' . I feel my age and positive attitude are keeping me alive. I am hopefully starting a clinical trial very soon to try and control the cancer in my lungs. Despite having advanced cancer i am going nowhere and hope to live for a few years yet. 
    You say your mum has terminal diagnosis but how is she in herself and have the doctors given a life expectancy as everyone is different? If you need to talk I am here for you during this heartbreaking situation. There is no easy way to get through this but in my experience talking to others helps. My thoughts are with you x

  • Offline in reply to happydays29

    Hi Vicky,

    I am so sorry about your mum and what you are going through at the moment. My mum has larangeal cancer diagnosed two weeks ago which is advanced. She is 69 I am 42. I am devestated. I am numb. She's unaware of what's happening as she is in denial and has short term memory problems. We have been told that palliative care would be the kindest / best option for her.. please know you are not alone. You will get through this. Wishing you strength on this journey you are facing x

  • Offline in reply to happydays29

    Thank you for taking the time to reply to my post... So sorry to hear about what you're going through and about your mother's death. I wish you all the best and hope youre going to have many more years with your children.

    she got diagnosed about a year and a half ago ... a year ago she was told she has 3-6 months to live but until now the cancer stopped growing but unfortunately last week we were told that the cancer started growing again and that she'll get chemo to try and "keep her alive for a while" .. since that dreadful news my mam basically stopped eating starting vomiting, doesn't want to talk to anyone doesn't answer phone calls which is very hard for me as I live 3 hours drive from her and she doesn't even want to speak to me she just closed herself in and think she just gave up at this stage that she got fed up because she was convinced she's getting better... because she felt perfect, it's so heartbreaking seeing her go through so much pain I don't know what to say to her anymore...

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    Dearest vicki - my heart goes out to you I can hear your angst in your words - the feeling of being so out of control,and not being able to,press the pause button.  My kids will have to go through the same. But know you are so much stronger than u realise right now. Allow the tears, let them flow and don't hide your feelings. Tell your mum how much you love and appreciate her ...... it's soooo hard to say goodbye but u will carry her in your heart forever and as u grow older u will find yourself doing things the way she did and u will smile . Be gentle with yourself .....you are loved unconditionally from beyond you are not alone.......and even when she passes she will be near just not on the physical plane. Have faith you brave lassie .... you will get through this - so much love xx

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