Help pls for pallative care for a parent!

Hi, I dont even know where too start,  so recently my mum found out she had stage 2 bowel cancer (symtoms ongoing before covid), then a pet in December revealed stage 4 bowel and liver, this is where it gets complicated, my mum fell down the stairs broke her leg, obviously was in hospital, found out she had a pulmonary embolism, so shes on treatment for that, long story short she got sepsis, was exemely ill, then they found a sore on her back which up until today I was told was getting better thats not the case,    its a grade 4 which is bleeding they have managed too stop it for now but obviously I found out 9 hours ago its gone from maybe 3 to 12 months prognosis too like maybe she will die this week , I dont even know how too process it this quick , unfortunately my son also has cancer and is on chemotherapy and hes left with multiple health issues, I lireally feel like the weight of a crane has being lifted into my chest, I have no clue with adults what too do, my mums currently in a care home but they have now said its be experdoated too an emergency for palliation for im more inclined for a hospice as my mum will get the best care, if you got too the end of this then thank you for reading... I'm just I just dont know where too start and what too sort

  • I'm so sorry you are carrying all this burden. Do you have Power of Attorney for your mum's Health & Wellbeing?

    You need to have a meeting with the care home & your mum's GP (it may be the one used by the care home) so that you can ask what palliative care they can provide and, if you aren't happy with that, can her GP place a request with the local hospice(s) to see if there is any space for your mum. One thing they will consider is whether moving your mum will have a more detrimental effect than treating her in the care home. My mum was in hospital when we realised she only had a short time left. She deteriorated so fast she couldn't go to the hospice as arranged as the move would have been too much for her.

    Wishing you well with your mum's care and your son's treatment.

    Angie x

  • Hi , sadly my mum passed on Friday very quickly after going downhill on thurs, honestly its al lately a blue x