It's a horrible and crap situation to be in.

I'd say if you can, continue to see him as I'm sure it'll be a great comfort and support to him, if unsure ask him honestly how he wants you to be around him, does he want help, does he want to chat about life and memories or does he just want you to sit with him, maybe read him the paper or read him a book while he rests, if he's well maybe even play a bored game? That way the visits will have a focus? BUT you also really need to get support for yourself...there is no shame in feeling rubbish and overwhelmed - it is rubbish and overwhelming!

Maybe go and see your GP and talk to them? There are options for you to have counselling, meds and other coping rescources that they can point you too. MacMillan also may be able to help and talk to you?

There may be local support groups in your area or even chatting in forums can help to get advice from ppl you don't know in ways to cope with your grief.

I'm not sure if you work or where but some places have free support available if you ask HR they may be able to offer you some compassionate leave or support with hours etc...

Wishing you well!

thankyou for your advice and kind words, i sat with my grandpa monday and he was so peaceul, he died tuesday at 5pm, im really struggling but im going to keep fighting and making him proud.

My grandpa died 4 years ago yesterday, the 5th of September. He was basically my father, I lived with him and my grandma my whole life. He died of lung cancer after having it for 2 years. 

I'd be lying if I said it gets easier as time goes on, it doesn't get easier but it does become less painful. 

But you deserve all the time you need to grieve. Cry all you want, talk about him as much as you want, tell your family you miss him as I'm sure they do too. 

Talking about him is one of the best things you can do, no only does it keep a part of him with you it makes everyone more comfortable about the situation. 

I'm sure no matter what you do in life you'll make him proud, but the best thing you can do to make him proud is look after yourself. There should be nothing  more important!