Hello PeterPopples; sorry that you are going through this - do I take it you are the only child as you seem to be bearing the whole burden of coping yourself.    From what you have written your mum is very aware that her illness is terminal and she may be finding it difficult to broach the subject of funeral etc herself.  Bite the bullet and talk to her about these difficult subjects; you will probably both feel better (involve your wife as well, she will surelty want to support you).  Ask you mum what she would like to do (I am guessing Disneyland  may not be high on her list!).  Regarding her grandchildren growing up, together you can make a memory book which can include things like photos (don't fight shy of asking for this to be done - this is stuff she obviously feels will be important), letters she has written for her grandchildren to read and anything else that you think would help them to "know" their grandmother.  You will be a lot unhappier if you don't discuss these things for the future and they don't get done.  I am reading that you are all very upset (naturally)  but these are things you would very much regret not doing.  It would be better if you all got together and sorted these things out instead of bearing individual pain and not getting things done.  Don't know if this helps but good luck and best wishes to you and your family.  Annie

Thanks Annie. Really kind words. Actually brought me to tears to read them. It's amazing to think there are people out there who will take some time to offer you advice. You are very kind.

I think I will have to broach these subjects with my mum. You're right, I will regret it if I don't. I really like the idea of a memory book. It will probably be really hard to do but important to ensure she feels better knowing she won't be forgotten.

Thanks again for your kind words and advice.

You are more than welcome.  Do let us know how things go (but only if you would l ike to!).  Annie