Thoughts on the Dying Process

I insert my late wife's thoughts.  She died of Kidney cancer of the lymph glands on 19th January this year.  She was very positive to the end and tried hard to learn and share her experience for the benefit of others.

Please feel free to view and read and share with anyone who would benefit.  Debbie's horror was dying young and mine is living without her but her message is one of hope. xxx

  • Thanks Jules,

    I did have a great weekend, including supporting an event for our local hospice with my new girl.  Have now also finally completed our insurance claim form for the loss of passports, but still waiting for new passport forms to arrive!!

    Hope you and hubby had a good weekend?

    Lots of love

    Ian xx

  • Hi Ian

    Only just caught u on ths thread.  All I can say is hopefully you have all your bad luck for this year already.  I am sure you cannot be due any more bad luck.  Hope th phone was insured.

    Also hpe you finally get the new passports.

    Best wishes.

    Gill

  • Morning Ian

    Life sounds good for you just now, so very pleased for you and your new girl!  Paperwork has its own frustrations but hope new passports will soon be so sorted so you can be whisked away again.

    We had a very quiet weekend the highlight being trip to supermarket - needs must ha ha.  Today am going to visit Mum (trying to gear myself up as doubt there will be much change in her attitude bless her) and with repeat 'fishing programme' on the tv am off to immerse myself in housework until time to go.

    Have a good week. hugs  Jules x

  • Hi Jules,

    Thanks.  Yes but life is in the process.  Whatever you have to do is still living in my eyes and needs to be savoured ~ whether having fun with a loved one or doing the housework and shopping!! Its all life filled with meeting people, seeing all sorts of things and colours and smells and weather .  'Each moment at a time', as Deb once wrote.

    Have a good week.

    Big virtual hug

    Ian x

  • Thanks Gill,

    Much appreciated xx

    Ian

  • Hi Ian

    Am doing my best to 'hold on to those moments' whatever I happen to be feeling/doing. Am so grateful to have my virtual friends to 'hang out with' too.  We are currently watching programmes about a chap building his own kit plane -there have been a series of different builds.  Hubby is, I think enjoying these (he had his wings when he was in the ATC) and also it makes a change from the usual afternoon tv!

    Hope all is well with you and yours and that Jack is keeping out of mischief.  Enjoy the forthcoming bank holiday (I have 5 days leave now -yippee).  Sending hugs  Jules x 

  • Hi Jules,

    Hope your Bank Holiday was as good as mine, spent mainly in Hove with Jack and my new lady.  With the weather being so good as it has has helped a good break seem even better.... and I have continued to enjoy becoming again in this New World of mine.  I have found that once freed from the tension and stress, there really is a World out there to be rediscovered...

    Lots of love Ian xx

  • Hi Ian

    Lovely to hear that you had an enjoyable bank holiday weekend with your good lady and Jack.  I think you  have said that she is a cat person so assuming she has one, how does Jack get on with it?

    I have enjoyed a five day break (back tomorrow) and as the weather here was lovely here too I am sporting a 'healthy glow' as did both some gardening and some relaxing with my book (now finished and need to choose the next one from my waiting pile).  Also spent time out with our daughter and grandsons visiting local farmers' market (hubby chose to stay at home) and having lunch out and then we all trooped back to ours and enjoyed some playtime with the swingball before they returned home.  Hubby had a couple of low days (lack of sleep at night because he did not want to take back up pain relief).  I had a little word in his ear and told him the pain relief is supplied for a reason and though I know he does not like 'giving in to it' he may feel better if he did as his oncologist suggested.  Of course he did not appreciate 'talking' about it but since I spoke up he has topped up his medication the last couple of days and his appetite has once again improved. As you know its a rollercoaster but not one I plan getting off of just yet.  I did a little retail therapy yesterday for birthday gift for my Mum and visited her today (can't believe how quickly the week comes around) and helped with the crossword solving during my hours stay.  Now planning a quiet afternoon (hubby is watching fishing programmes again so will find something to occupy me(have seen them so many times I practically know the dialogue!!

    Take care of yourself and really pleased life is treating you well.  Hugs  Jules x

  • Hi Jules,

    Jack and Ralf (my lady's female cat!) don't get on at all.  They tolerate each other and Ralf attacks Jack if he is near her and threatens him in the garden.  It is funny to watch!!  In time they will adapt, as they must.

    Sounds as if you had a nice 5 day break ~ as did I ~ only trouble is how quickly you forget it when you return to normality!

    I'm playing in my trio to an audience on Saturday which should be good.  It will be the first time Julie will have seen us play!!

    Lots of virtual hugs and kind thoughts.

    Ian x

  • Hi Ian

    Love the idea of the cat getting to tolerate Jack and  am sure in time they will sort out the 'ground rules'.  When was that 5 day break again!!    Two days back at work and yesterday sitting at the bedside of a good friend has reminded me once again how sweet the good days are (but am currently emotionally drained).  That rollercoaster life is back again but am trying to 'roll with it'.

    Sounds like you are in for a 'fun Saturday' and am sure Julie (good name by the way) will have a great time (because you are there together).  Enjoy and sending kind thoughts as always.  Jules x