Hi, my mum has been fighting secondary breast cancer to her bones, lungs and liver for the past 2 years. the chemotherapy that her wonderful oncologist gave her these 2 years, and enabled us to make some very treasured memories. Up until about 4 weeks ago things were going fairly well, my sister and me took her out for the evening, she was tired but looked lovely and enjoyed the night. Two weeks after that we were told that her scan results were like looking at another persons results from the last scan. Things had gone bad and the chemo has stopped working. We've been told there's no further treatment and my mum and us are devastated. In two weeks she's gone from a fairly upbeat vibrant woman to a thin, tired and traumatised shadow of her former self. We don't want to lose her but the thing we are struggling with the most is the mental torture she us going through. How do we cope, what can we expect, how long has she got left? Apparently she's jaunduced in her eyes, her Weight loss incredible over just two weeks. She can hardly walk, she barely go's to the loo but she's 100% lucid. We want to make her last weeks special but don't want to plan the wrong things in the wrong order if that makes sense. Can anyone help us understand what we can expect? 

Hi.  I've just been reading these posts and noticed yours was so recent.  My mum is going through a similar thing to you. How is your mum doing now?

Hi I'm 32 I love my mum with all my heart !!! She has breast cancer so she had Chemo, radiotherapy and an op and seemed OK. But now she is often struggling to breathe... She smokes maybe 30 fags a day so maybe now she has contracting lung disease I dunno. I have 3 kids and a fiancé I keep going out drinking to try and forget that my mum won't be here soon. It's not the answer but I can't cope I'm so sad it makes me feel sick to think of it . I have so much responsibility with my kids I never have a second to myself unless I go out at night but then I end up drinking. I feel under pressure I need my mum 

Hi goldefish, I had a email through to say someone replied to my post and I couldn't ignore your message. Firstly I am so sorry you are going through this, I remember all to well the pain me and my family went through. Please try and find comfort in the fact that you will be ok, and your mum will be at peace and no longer in pain. I understand how difficult it is and how upset you must feel right now as well as angry and even a little lost or even numb, I am sure you will also feel as though things will never get better but I promise they will, and you will be ok. It won't be over night and you may feel like something is missing in your life, but your mum will always be a part of you and although she may not be there in the flesh she will be in other ways. Big hugs to you x

Hey, That really sucks. I can't say anything that is going to help, nothing helps. My son has brain cancer and I'm constantly thinking about what we won't we get to do together, how long we have with him, how destroyed his little sister will be without him. Anyway, if you want a stranger to talk to, rant at, share coping mechanisms with, feel free to chat to me. I know I could do with a stranger to open up to.... No matter how I try, or who with, I can't open up to family and friends. I don't know why, it just seems easier with strangers. Stay strong, or at least try. 

Hi I'm really sorry to hear about your mum. My mum also started off with breast cancer 12 years ago now and has slowly been spreading to her bones. Until recently anyway. It's now in all her bones and only a matter of time before it spreads to organs.  She can no longer walk. The onl y thing she can do for herself is eating and drinking and nd she doesn't eat much anyway.  Hope your mums as well as she can be. 

Jenny