Hi katie

How are things.Have you managed to talk to anyone in your family about whats happening with your grandad?I am sorry i cannot tell you about his cancer but i do have a lot of experience of pain control and the main issue is that it works.Modern medicine cannot always save us but it can give us an easyer time of it .I came very close to dieing and the knowledge that it has left me with is that it is not nearly as frightening as it seems. It seemed to me like a gradual walking away.It will always be sad but the sadness is because he is loved.

Hey grumpy. I stayed at my grandad's Sunday and Monday night, he cooked me dinner on the Monday and still likes too get around and go shopping ect.

He is getting his scan results back tomorrow too see if his cancer has spread, just hoping for the best.

Thanks for the reply and sorry too hear about your experience. I just wanted to know how bad it would be for him, but it doesn't seem too painful which I'm happy with! Thanks a lot, hope you're ok xx

My husband had stage 4 esophageal cancer diagnosed in Sept 2016 and he died on 20th December that year. One attempt with chemo set him back and with hind sight  perhaps we were grasping at hope. All it did in his case was cause more discomfort. Also when your loved one is very ill in extreme pain at 2 am there is not much help out there, despite promises from cancer hospital and MacMillan. On call locum or district nurse. He hated being in hospital as pain relief was limited unless signed up by doctor. So I nursed him at home as was his request as best I could. I feel when family wish to take this route more help / training to give injections by family instead of having to wait hours for nurses to come should be available. I carried out my husbands wish to die at home but feel delays in pain relief did not make an easy end. I have to live with that memory every day. I learned 'on the job' so now feel more able should I have to nurse anyone else in a similar situation. My advice is, you need to discuss your own situation to decide. My husband had great difficulty with his diet once the cancer blocked his esophagus. He lost so much weight and was sick coughing up blood and bloody diarrhea too. This lead to anaemia and constant nausea. We were not warned about this. Also the cancer caused cacaxia which we were not warned about either. The better your loved one can eat and keep their strength up the better chance to face chemo. Also some surgeons will operate and some won't. I wish you all the best and hope my frank post is informative. My prayers are with you.

My husband had oesophagus removed 18 months ago. Cancer came back Sept 2018 in oesophagus lymph nodes and liver which is terminal. He's just had 3rd cycle of chemo which he's stopped over Xmas due to constant diahrrea. Chemo nurse is ringing Monday to review.hes got a scan in mid Jan and results end of Jan to see if it's working. We are hopeful and positive for our 2 girls we have to be but he's not really tolerating chemo very well. If the oncologist recommend it then try it. Hope all goes well..it's so hard

My husband was diagnosed with stage 4 oesophageal cancer in Dec 2018 it had spread to his lymph nodes and stomach. He had his first round of chemo just before christmas and it gave him blood clots in his lungs, he was treated for it and may l say the chemo made him feel so ill. Giving the benefit of the doubt he started his 2nd round of chemo in january and felt so ill he made the decision to stop all treatment and let nature take its course. For us its the best decision we ever made palliative and district nurses look after him at the moment and keep his pain at bay with morphine patches he is increasingly becoming weaker but we have been on a few short trips with the family making memories which he could not have done when on chemotherapy

hello Screwylouis1

Just read your post.  i feel for you..... I really do.

Wishing you all much courage

Ruth x

Hi I have been diagnosed with esophageal grade4 cancer and it is in lymph nodes and liver.  Cant be operated on and been given 9 months with treatment or 1 year without treatment possibly.  I have no family and really struggling with decisions but considering not taking the palliative treatment offered so I have quality of live rather than quantity.  would be grateful for any thoughts. 

I am 61

Collie2

 Hello collie2

 I’m sorry to hear of your diagnosis, and I do appreciate your dilemma. 

 My husband died of this cancer seven months ago and whilst he was determined to fight it tooth and nail he really struggled with the palliative treatment.  We were told at that stage the treatment only had a 40% chance of success but if successful he would have between nine and 12 months left.  In the event he had one round of chemo, got a terrible chest infection and never really recovered from that. His medical team decided he was too weak for more chemo and Steve died two weeks later.  I think if we had our time over again we would not have had the palliative  treatment. That said, hindsight is a very exact science isn’t it? 

 I totally and utterly agree with your thoughts that quality of life is better than quantity.  But I would always be guided by your medical experts. You need to be kept comfortable, you need to be able to enjoy what time you have left. 

 Whatever your decision I wish you much luck and I hope your remaining time is full of love and laughter. 

xx

Many thanks for reply.  My mind is in turmoil.

Collie2

 Okay, if this will help you in anyway perhaps you could look at it like this. 

 If you are in anyway  undecided about what course of action to take I suggest you  choose the medication. If it becomes too much for you you can always stop. However if you decide against it and then change your mind it may be too late.

 I don’t think there are any easy answers here and you are certainly between a rock and a hard place. 

 If you do elect for medication, please make sure you do everything to look after yourself and minimise infection. You have to give yourself every opportunity to get the best out of it. And who knows you may find the treatment relatively easy. Certainly Steve’s first three rounds of chemo before his operation were a relative breeze. Other than a slight tingling sensation in his fingers and toes  he did not get any of the symptoms you hear about so often.

 Take care 

Hi Collie 2,

so sorry to hear of your diagnosis, my dad recently passed away from esophageal cancer, it had spread to the lymph nodes near the bowel by the time he was diagnosed, he was offered chemo and was told taking this may give him an extra 3 months if the cancer responded however this wasn’t guaranteed, he also gave my dad 1 year. My dad didn’t take the chemo as he wanted to have quality of life for his remaining time, sadly he didn’t get that either he passed away 3 months later. Everyone is different and there’s no easy answer, my dad made the right choice I don’t believe he would have seen the end of his chemo the cancer took over so quickly and the side effects were not worth #potentially if at all# giving him an extra month or 2. Your body may be stronger though do deep down what you feel is right for you x

hi

hi