Hi Katie and other readers

i know exactly what you are feeling and going through, my dad has terminal esophageal cancer which has now spread to his liver and stomach amongst other places, he initially underwent breakthrough keyhole surgery however discovering this secondary cancer has made him become terminal. I spent the first few days living in a haze of crying and drifting along in existence before i managed to buck my ideas up and get a grip on reality again. He is now in a lot of constant pain living on morphine (both patches and orally) and they are already mentioning changing medication as it just isnt 'cutting it'. Unfortunately this sort of cancer (although i have no experience of other types really) is very painful. I too am unaware of the true timescale and have no idea just how little time i have left with him - it chokes me up just trying to think of my life ahead without him there. If anyone does have information on the timescaling i would be very interested to hear what they have to say.....i am very pragmatic and prefer to be aware of realistic aims rather than just "hoping for the best", i just wish i knew if it were days, or weeks - i no longer expect it to be months as he is deteriorating at what seems to me like an expenential rate.

Hi Butterfly-baby

I've at last managed to find you - I have a job getting around the site.

I hope your Dad is feeling comfortable and that they have managed to get his pain relief right for him.

It's so upsetting thinking about timescale - especially as everyone is so different.  I've known several people with cancer of the gullet (including myself!) and they have lived for varying times after being diagnosed terminal.  My own Dad lived for 14 months, although was initially given 3 months to live.  You're right, it's a very painful, distressing cancer and not being able to eat is horrible.   I loved my Dad very dearly and like you, wondered how life would be without him.  However, in the end I was glad his suffering was over and it helped me to cope.

I think of you often, as I know what a distressing time you're having.  Life can deal some very bitter blows but a lovely daughter like you will come through safely.

Carrie xx

Hi Butterfly-baby

I've at last managed to find you - I have a job getting around the site.

I hope your Dad is feeling comfortable and that they have managed to get his pain relief right for him.

It's so upsetting thinking about timescale - especially as everyone is so different.  I've known several people with cancer of the gullet (including myself!) and they have lived for varying times after being diagnosed terminal.  My own Dad lived for 14 months, although was initially given 3 months to live.  You're right, it's a very painful, distressing cancer and not being able to eat is horrible.   I loved my Dad very dearly and like you, wondered how life would be without him.  However, in the end I was glad his suffering was over and it helped me to cope.

I think of you often, as I know what a distressing time you're having.  Life can deal some very bitter blows but a lovely daughter like you will come through safely.

Carrie xx