Husband died a few days after diagnosis of GI cancer but was being treated for slow growing mouth tumour and consultant said he was cancer free

My husband just died two days ago of advanced GI cancer. He was being treated for a slow growing cancer in the lower right hand side of his jaw. He had surgery that was successful to remove the cancer and then it was said to have returned. He has further surgery to remove the ‘ Reuther cancer’ but this was found out to be non cancerous. Following this surgery he found he was going downhill instead of feeling better. He wasn’t eating and just shattered all the time. He went to the GP and the maximo clinic and the GP treated him by taking blood samples and telling us to self refer for speech and language therapy 

The clinic were concerned about his non eating but said it was connected with the psychological effects of the surgery and brought in a dietician and the surgeon said he was cancer free as far as they were concerned and just eat. My son asked if anything else could be going on. Clinic surgeon said not to do with the slow growing mouth cancer as far as they were concerned cancer free but could go back to GP 

afyrt several weeks of going further down hill GP eventually referred to hospital for admission

5 days later he is dead.

where do I get answers? We saw 6 different doctors on quick ward rounds in 4 days. He changed beds and wards 4 times and had no pain relief other than paracetemol until three days in. 

who can tell me what’s happened how did this all happen? Do they just say he’s dead now so that’s it. Where do I go to for someone to explain what has happened to me. I’ve been widowed in a few days when I thought my husband was cancer free. I’ve been supporting him all wrong not knowing what to do. 

  • Sorry for your loss

    I can identify with what you've been through 

    My mum is currently at home on end of life care after being treated for salivery gland cancer.  she had salivery gland and lymph nodes removed in April 2023 and had 3 monthly ct scans the last one being March 24 which was full body and clear.

    Fast forward to August mum feeling tired and not right. Two weeks to get GP apointment two weeks for appointment for blood test as can no longer walk in and have blood taken despite the clinic being empty.  Day after bloods taken she receives phone call to say liver is abnormal and had to go for ultrasound next day which showed numerous lessons. Ct scan next which showed numerous mets in abdomen. Her pancreas, adrenal glands liver lymph nodes. All this has happened since March. I questioned why the ct scan didn't show any of this to be told she just had chest scan. Upon clearing her living room to make room for the hospital bed I find the letter from match stating she did have a full body scan and stating it was clear and no sign of mets.

    I just feel that someone has missed something somewhere and I have put a complaint in to pals and they are now investigating it. Im my mums only relative and I feel like I can't just put it down as one of them things   

  • We put in a complaint to pals about care and it just gave the doctor time to invent a *** and bully story. I think it might be almost better to get legal advice first. The dermatologist lied and said my partner had refused a biopsy which he'd never do. We've had too much going to pursue it but it'd have been a case of her word against ours.