Kerr81,

I am so sorry that you find yourself in this situation.  My sister also was diagnosed with secondary breast cancer and treatment eventually turned to just palliative care.  Her son was only 7 years old when she passed away, but in the months running up to her death, my brother-in-law arranged to take their son to counselling to try to prepare him for what was to come.  Initially my brother-in-law rebelled against talking to a counsellor himself, but eventually relented, he found it a great help to be able to talk to someone that wasnt his wife or family.  Someone that was just there for him, to hear him and make no judgement.  He actually continued to see the counsellor for a couple of years after her death.

There are no words that can make this easier for you, but maybe this would be something worth considering for yourself and your son.

I am not sure if you have got a Maggies centre attached to the hospital where your wife is being treated?  Alternatively Macmillan may be able to give some suggestions.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Annie