Hello Amyk556

I'm sorry to hear about your Grandad's diagnosis and that his health is deteriorating on a daily basis. 

We do have some information on our website here which you may find helpful but if you want to talk things through with one of our nurses you're welcome to call them on 0808 800 4040, Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm. 

I hope this helps. 

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator 

Hi there, 

my dad passed away of prostate cancer on 4th December.  I was exactly the same as you looking for answers online and getting frustrated.  Believe me when I say you will know when they are passing away.  With my dad his voice got lower around a month before he passed he started with severe agitation and secretions around a week before he passed and in the 3 days before he stopped eating and drinking, and was sedated due to the agitation.  Before he passed away I noticed his breathing went quiet (there was no death rattle) and then it took a while to get his breath, and when he took his last I was with him and it was peaceful.  Just spend as much time as you can with your grandad and talk to him as he can still hear you.  You might find your experience is different but this was mine.  I wish you and your family all the best and I hope Iv given you some insight.  Look after yourself too as we sometimes neglect ourselves xxx

Thanks so much for your comment. Sadly my Grandad passed away on Friday. :( 

We are so devastated:(

I am so so deeply sorry for your loss :( 

Just try keeping him healthy, smiling and happy in your thoughts - this helps me sometimes. I know it is really hard to do, at this very moment, as it is so very recent..... there is just no ONE right way of how all of this works I'm afraid. 

I listen to a lot of grief podcasts on spotify, which I find helpful as I can relate a lot to similar experiences for people similar in age (as I am 33 and am a motherless daughter) (to mention a few 'grief sofa', 'not so linear')

There also is a HUGE grief community on instagram, with lots of advice and support.

I have recently also reached out to 'Let's talk about loss' community. It's for 18-35 young adults that lost a loved one. Sorry, I am just sharing what works for me - I do not know how old you are but am sure there is a community to support in your case as well. Talking to people that can relate, helps a lot.

Feel free to reach out to me, if you need anything at all, I would be happy to help.

Sending you my strength and best thoughts and prayers.. Bless you, your Grandad and your Family.