My beautiful 31yr old daughter has BC

Hi everyone. My beautiful 31 year old daughter has been diagnosed with Breast Cancer. She she is a single mum of 3 children age 11, 7 and 5, the oldest and the youngest have ASD. 

She found a lump in May last year and made an appointment with the GP she told him that her paternal grandmother is a breast cancer survivor after a double mastectomy. This doctor basically laughed at her and told her she just has lumpy boobs. I wasn't aware of this at the time as she thought there was nothing wrong and was made to feel stupid. 

Fast forward 9 months she went to a female doctor who examined her and rushed her through to the breast clinic. We have just had her BC diagnosis. She has a 40mm lump on her right boob and some lymph nodes are affected. We were shaken to the core with the news. She is terrified and I am heartbroken and scared.

She has a CT scan on Wednesday to check if it has spread. She has a coil fitted which the specialist said it needs to be moved ASAP as it could be speeding up the cancer. 

She rang the doctors explained she has got a BC diagnosis and that the specialist has said the coil needs to be removed ASAP. So they offered her an appointment in April!!!!

I am keeping my positive pants on when I am around her, which is most of the time as I have stayed with her since her diagnosis on Thursday because she doesn't want to be on her own , especially when the kids are in bed.So far we have cried together, got angry with the world together. Also laughed together (that is short lived at the moment)The specialist is starting her on chemo to try and shrink the lump before surgery and give her a genetic test. The results from the genetic test will determine what surgery she has. 

She is convinced the cancer has spread and is absolutely terrified. As much as I try to keep her positive,  I cannot seem take that feeling of dread away from her. Obviously under the radar I am scared to death for her.

It should be me at my age going through this. Not her. 

So sorry for the long post. Xxx

  • Just read your post and I'm so sorry you are all going through this. 

    Im 32 with 2 young children and was diagnosed with triple positive breast cancer last month. I should be starting chemotherapy in the next 2 weeks. 

    I have read a few stories about young women going to the doctors about breast concerns and they are just shrugged off because they're "too young to have cancer". It is absolutely diabolical and something that desperately needs to be sorted out. 

    It is very difficult to keep positive, especially at the start, all the waiting drives me crazy and gets your mind wandering to some dark places. 

    It's so lovely that you have stayed with your daughter since the diagnosis, you will be a pillar of strength for her.

    All I can say is that she needs to just take it one step at a time, one test at a time, and focus on the end goal.....to get through the treatment, as horrid as it will be, but she will make it out for her children. 

    If you or she needs to chat you can message me as we are all going through this together. I've found speaking to people who are going through the same thing has helped me so much.

    Keep your head up and keep staying positive for her, and she will follow your example. We've all got this together 

    Amy x

  • Hi, so sorry to hear your daughter and you are going through this, ive been there with my own daughter, diagnosed in her 30`s with 2 young children, her diagnosis was the worst day of our lives, a huge shock and terrifying, but a year later, she has gotten through all the treatments, chemo, rads and operation (lumpectomy) and apart from immune therapy she is done with all that, she is doing great right now and looks beautiful , post chemo lovely thick curly hair, looks very cute :-) it was a very difficult time, im not going to lie, full of ups and downs, lots of tears and feeling terrified all the time, even now this  never goes away, i dont think it ever will, as a mum i just wish it had been me and not her, but it is what it is, and we have gotten through with her bravery and the support of people we love......you will too...feel free to message me anytime, am here to help if i can, i wish you all the very best and stay positive, dont listen to negatives, be there for her, she will need all the support she can get, and believe that she can beat this and be just fine again because she can  xxx.

  • Thank you so much for your reply. I am so glad your daughter got through it. It certainly is comforting to hear a positive outcome. Much love to you and your family xxx

  • Thankyou, i know that  at the beginning it feels like youve been hit by a sledgehammer, but  your daughter obviously has a loving and supportive mum in you and she will be ok,  take one day at a time, dont stress and deal with everything when it comes,  remember "this too shall pass"....sending much love and good wishes to you both, im very happy to talk to you should you need to chat anytime  :-) xxx

  • Hi so sorry to hear your sad news .the waiting is the worst . Once treatment starts you go on a rollercoaster ride .take one day at a time .i had bteastcancer in 2017 had lumpectomy  and radiotherapy.  Have cancer tablets for five years ..you will get throughthis sending you all big hugs