I am so sorry to hear of your wife's and Father in Laws passing. I can't even imagine what you must be going through right now and I'm truly sorry.

I'm not sure there's anything any one of us could write that would make things any easier for you during this awful time but please accept the help and support that your friends and family are offering to you, As difficult as that may seem.

As for your experience with your door bell I would love for you to find comfort in this. Prior to this week I wouldn't have read too much in to it however last week a dream notified me of a lump in my breast and sure enough it is there, I'm now on the urgent pathway for further tests. There's many things in life and of course death which we don't know about but sometimes these signs need to be embraced. 

Sending love and hope to you and your family. 

Good morning Lucy thank you so so much for your kind words and reply. Yes I do beleive their are little things that happen when love ones pass just to let you know they are OK and free from all the nastiness they had to endure with their illness. I know in my heart Sharon would be telling me off now and wanting me to carry on as normal. She was so strong and has made a huge impact on everyone that has had the pleasure of meeting her. The vision wS definitely someone telling g me that she and my father in law were happy and with other family members. I do hope that your results and support are all good and you receive the support you so much deserve. My kindest thoughts are with you at this difficult time. Dave 

Hi Dave. I am so sorry to hear of your loss and it is understandable to feel a range of disabling emotions including fear. My mother in law lost her husband to Covid. She woke up on the sofa after a nap to find him standing in front of her but it unnerved her - perhaps because she doesn't believe in any kind of afterlife. At the moment of his passing one of our lights blew in the house and it is surprisingly common to receive visits from loved ones who have passed. An elderly lady I was good friends with once saw her husband's face morph out of the fireplace. It was so bizarre she only told me and one other person but he was smiling and looked at peace so although it gave her a jolt she took comfort from it. You know that your wife would certainly not mean you any harm so I think it's a more of a case of some primal fear of some kind? Could a relative or friend stay with you in your own home? The reason I say this is because fears tend to grow if not faced and you know logically there is nothing to fear so baby steps to nip it in the bud and acclimatise could save issues further on. You may like to sleep on the sofa or in another room? It took a long time for a lady I know to sleep in the marital bed. She also had to have the radio on to provide a sense of company. Sometimes we are also afraid because we fear a deceased loved one will be cross with us? It may sound silly but you could have a "conversation" with your wife and ask her not to frighten you? Xx