Hello, my mum died last April from a different type of sarcoma. It recurred in her bowl after 12 years of it first appearing in the uterus muscle. She had been completely healthy since her first surgery in 2008 and this was a massive shock for us. We naively thought she would survive another 12 years (she was 71) but it came back after a few months and she passed away 5 months later. I felt the same way as you - such trauma of seeing her in her final 6 days at home. She could barely even move she was so weak. Each day she detoriorated further and it was so difficult to see. I was almost relived when she passed and coping well for a couple of weeks but that's when the grief and PTSD began. I would wake up each night picturing her like you do. It was like a punch in the gut. I did some bereavement couselling which helped and now, I still miss her every minute of each day but I dont feel as much of the trauma of seeing her so ill. I think I have accepted that her soul was leaving her body gradually before she passed so she wasn't suffering too much. I feel for you so much - your mum was even younger than mine. Sarcomas are evil - so aggressive - and there really seems to be no cure. They are so rare too that I get how unlucky you must feel. You just def see a doctor if you like yours and see if they can send you to a grief counsellor. It certaintly helped me a bit. But the pain and loss is still there, can't say it gets that much better if you are close to your parent. It has been 15 months now and was her birthday this last Sunday.

I find this forum helpful - I would come here everyday and hear other people's stories of grief. I don't know why or how but it helps me to know my family weren't the only ones. 

Love R xx

Hello, my mum died last April from a different type of sarcoma. It recurred in her bowl after 12 years of it first appearing in the uterus muscle. She had been completely healthy since her first surgery in 2008 and this was a massive shock for us. We naively thought she would survive another 12 years (she was 71) but it came back after a few months and she passed away 5 months later. I felt the same way as you - such trauma of seeing her in her final 6 days at home. She could barely even move she was so weak. Each day she detoriorated further and it was so difficult to see. I was almost relived when she passed and coping well for a couple of weeks but that's when the grief and PTSD began. I would wake up each night picturing her like you do. It was like a punch in the gut. I did some bereavement couselling which helped and now, I still miss her every minute of each day but I dont feel as much of the trauma of seeing her so ill. I think I have accepted that her soul was leaving her body gradually before she passed so she wasn't suffering too much. I feel for you so much - your mum was even younger than mine. Sarcomas are evil - so aggressive - and there really seems to be no cure. They are so rare too that I get how unlucky you must feel. You just def see a doctor if you like yours and see if they can send you to a grief counsellor. It certaintly helped me a bit. But the pain and loss is still there, can't say it gets that much better if you are close to your parent. It has been 15 months now and was her birthday this last Sunday.

I find this forum helpful - I would come here everyday and hear other people's stories of grief. I don't know why or how but it helps me to know my family weren't the only ones. 

Love R xx

ps - my mum didnt smoke or drink either. She was mostly vegetarian and ate lots of organic food. Life is so cruel xx