My mam was diagnosed with secondary liver cancer last month. Her primary was of unknown origin. I didn't even know such cancer existed. We thought she had long covid (she had covid in December) she was tired, lethargic and had lost weight but we thought covid had affected her apetite.
She started falling down and the investigations told us that her cancer was untreatable.
Her consultant told us she had about a month left yet here we are 20 days later and she's gone.
Initially I did a lot of reading on this site to find out more information and what to expect which helped enormously.
I'm here now sharing our story. It's her funeral on Tuesday. We had 6 hours at home with her once she passed and I feel like I said goodbye yet I'm torn about visiting her in the chapel of rest. Im not scared I just don't want to have the pain of saying goodbye again. I feel its expected that I should.
I don't want to go but I don't want the regret of not going either. I have tomorrow should I decide to see her one last time. I want to remember her before the cancer ravaged her body. Is it wrong not to go?
Im 50 years old and I remember grandparents passing and the feelings but this is a million times worse. I can't imagine life without her, she was kind, supportive, my best friend and her unconditional love was just as you'd expect.
I hope that sharing my story helps one person who is browsing this site looking for answers or similar stories.
Just one more thing I have found 3 white feathers in my home and 2 of my daughters found them too. Gave us great comfort to think she was near.
