Hi Sam, 

I am so sorry to hear about your Mam. I completely understand how you feel. My mam was diagnosed with renal cancer that had gone to her lungs, bones, liver and thyroid. I lost my Mam 6 weeks ago and her diagnosis to losing her was 7 months and I cared for her. It is the hardest thing I have ever had to watch, you're so busy looking after them and then to see them pass is something I will never ever get over. I can't imagine how it must feel to have only had a short time like you did to get your head around that. I have only just gone back to work and it's been so hard, I'm so angry that the world is going back to normal without my beautiful mam, most days I just want to lie in bed and cry and don't want to do anything, I still do most nights. I got a journal from Amazon called Angel catcher and I have been writing in that and have found that does help. It's really emotional writing in it but it has some sections to write memories and things in which helps me remember her before she was poorly! I would definitely recommend it, it might not be for everyone but it can't hurt. There is nothing I can really say to make you feel better, but I have been doing things with my dad like going on walks to the coast and just generally keeping busy and have found that comforting. I keep looking for little signs too. Thinking of you, it's going to be so hard but we will get through it ️ X 

Hi 

My mum died on Thursday morning.  She had lung cancer, diagnosed in Nov 2019. She was admitted to hospital 6 weeks ago with an infection, and we were told 2 weeks ago there was nothing more they could do.  She wanted to come home and I am so relieved we were able to do this. My brother, dad and I did everything we could to take care of her for the first week home, and we were able to have important conversations, with nothing left unsaid.  For the last 4 days of her life she was sleeping or sedated, and we had hospice at home in to support us.  Whilst this is as mum would have wanted and should feel a comfort, I still feel such  terrible physical pain and anxiety, unlike anything I've ever felt. I can't stop crying. A few days before she died she put her tiny, thin arms around my neck and said "I love you so." And it breaks my heart when I think about it. I am longing for my mum.  I know this is early on in the grieving process, but I feel physical pain. My mouth has ulcers, I feel like I have flu, I am so tired but cannot sleep. I am wondering what the point really is of all of this.  I don't know how to be without my beautiful mum. 

Hi i feel for you all .loss is unbearable yes your heart feels like its being ripped out . Ive just lost my son from sarcoma went to his lungs and bones .he lastwd four months from the day we found out i spent every min with him. Im now lost .i want to scream at the world .im so angry. My sam was 25 he had his life ahead of him .taken in a heartbeat he was my superhero he was so brave he put me to shame .i hope his having a party with all your mums looking after him for me . ..i just want to know his ok .his funeral was last week . I might be crazy the robin comes sits on the fence .i was watering the flowers and a feather dropped from the sky ..have to believe theres something better  .sending all my love and hugs xxx

I am so so sorry to hear this, my heart breaks for you! No one should lose their child. I definitely believe in signs too and take so much comfort from little visits like that. You definltely have to believe there is something better. Sending you so much love and hugs back. Sam is very lucky to have a lovely Mum, stay strong ️ Xxx