Hello TrajanNinja

I'm so very sorry to hear about the recent loss of your wife. It obviously has and continues to be an incredibly difficult time for you and all the family and I'm glad that you've reached out for support. 

I'm sure some of our community members will stop by to post as well but I specifically wanted to reply to try and put you in touch with [@Chris2020]‍ who sadly lost his wife a few months ago and is now a single Dad to two children. You can read his story here and you'll find that there are lots of other members on that thread who have similar losses. 

I also wanted to signpost you to an organisation called Cruse who are a bereavement charity. it may be that you want to explore arranging some emotional support for yourself and for the girls as well. 

Keep in touch TrajanNinja. I'm sure the community will do its best to offer you some support along this journey. 

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator 

Thank you,

It's been really hard as vicki was my world and knowing that she not here any more, I just feel lost and heart broken I'm trying to be strong enough for my girls but I'm struggling with it all

Hi mate I'm so sorry for your loss 

I feel your pain I was were you are now five months ago  (my wife was 39 when she died ) it's a f ing long road mate to walk down but we will move forward  I guess you feel like what the f has happened  whyher why me  we  had  our whole lives to live together? Every day I cry we go to her grave and talk I miss her so much and love her sooo much 

anyway I'm here if you want to chat

Hey Chris,

Thank you for the message, yeah it's crap crying nearly everyday funeral is this Friday and I'm scared of letting her go even though she is no longer here physically, people I call friends and where close to us who said we care about you and be there for you and the girls have not bothered to call and check up on me, while people vicki knew and I don't have messaged me to check on me even called me for a chat, I know it only been over 2 weeks since it like time has stopped.

Regards

David 

Good luck for Friday it will be hard  I remember it all like yesterday! But I kept on thinking this is just her old body she is watching me from above in a new body. 
all my mate are pretty rubbish if I'm honest but her friends omg have been amazing true hero s. 
you got to remember knowone knows what your feeling and there to are in shock my your hardest to be with the girls think what your wit would do if it was the other way round ( I always do this) Ive got a two year old and a nine year old my wife is so worried about them if anything happened to her I promised I would not let her down I will bring them out the way she wouldn't want to be I guess I'm trying to say never forget the good inside you I still feel like there's a massive grief monster on my shoulder on the meter lose everything basically feels like the devil sitting on my shoulder so what's the point in being good! But then on the other shoulder is the wife give me the strength to get through this or is helping me at least.

id do anything to have her back but that can't happen it's up to me to keep her memories alive