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Am I grieving right?

mils84
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My beautiful,lovely,kind mum passed away 4 weeks and one day ago of terminal cancer, we were lucky enough to have her at home with us for her final days. 
But what do I do now? How do I cope with all these feelings I have? I want to talk to her and know that she is okay.

I feel like I'm not grieving properly if that makes sense,I feel bad for carrying on but I think of her every day, for most of the day if I'm honest.

Can someone please tell me if and when it gets easier as right now I'm struggling so bad without her 

Thank you 

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    Hey Mils,

    I'm so sorry about your mum. I have lost a parent and very close family members to cancer. I know only too well of the guilt you're speaking - but if anything you being able to carry on with life Is honouring your mum. She would love nothing more than you to get through this.

    It does get easier, your grief will always be there but you really do learn how to cope with it. Find your own wee ways of speaking to her. 
    Maybe a diary that you write things you'd have like to have told her or a jar where you put in wee notes. anything you can to get you through the day. There is no right or wrong way. But know that whatever you do your mum would be proud of you.

    all the best xxx

  • Offline in reply to Mallow06

    Thank you so so much for replying that has made me feel so much better and I love the jar idea, I started writing a diary but stopped so maybe I will carry on with that, I'm sorry to hear of your loss also sending hugs xx

  • Offline in reply to mils84

    I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my mum four months ago and I questioned my grieving at the time but now looking back I know there is no right or wrong way. My coping mechnism was to carry on and it is only now that it has really hit me. It comes completely out the blue and will build up over a few days until I break down. 
    I have found going to visit where my mums ashes are has really helped- it's like a release as I feel close to her again. I do still get angry how some people just carry on and seem to 'forget' her but I know deep down that's not the case. 
    take care of yourself and do whatever you feel right. X

  • Offline in reply to positivethoughts1

    I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum I'm sending hugs, I really am hoping it gets easier with time I just want to be near her and speak to her.

    im keeping a diary now of all the things I would have chatted to her about had we been face to face or on the phone.

    Take care and I'm here if you need to chat xx

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