I am so sorry, I can imagine how you are feeling, I lost my husband of 35 years back in June, I am trying to be strong, but inside I am screaming for help. What a dreadful feeling, I don't like to put on others, I try to cope, but it's so hard. Have you had any help at all? With what is going on with the Covid I don't like to bother people.  Christmas will not be easy, just have to go through it. I feel that I can not even smile any more. I don't know what advice to give, just that I feel your pain and hope in time we can get a bit better. Just look after yourself and we must try and be kind to ourselves. It's just a horrible feeling that doesn't go away, we have to remember the good times we had. 

Hi, I lost my husband in June and its horrendous. All though its been 6 months i still have emotional break downs. It builds up especially this time of year it so hard and lonely. It is normal To feel this way we have lost biggest partof out lifes. We did everything together. Lifes so cruel. 

Take care x