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My dad passed away I don’t know what to do

Preownedpulk
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My dad passed away from stomach cancer in July shortly after my 17th birthday I've had good help from my family but sometimes I hate talking to anyone in person about it because I can see sadness in their eyes and I hate causing that I brave through my days but I often feel lost I was expecting my dad to see me off to university and for my parents to travel this year but he was diagnosed in March and passed away shortly after he passed away at home and I tried to save him but it didn't work and it makes me feel terrible I just wanted to vent how I felt even if no one sees this if you have a Similar story and you'd like to share or vent feel free to I'm not great at advice but if someone's very recently lost a loved one feel free to comment.

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    Hi there ...

    So so sorry your going through this heartbraking time at the moment.... loosing a parent so young is very crule ... and we all grieve differently .. 

    I felt the same as you after loosing my amazing mum ... I would get a thought in my head when something happened like a programme she liked or a food she loved .. anything really .. and when I'd say it in those early years , like mum would love that ... or do you remember when mum ... and this look of sadness would come over my sister's.... like they'd cry if I said more ... so I learned for a few years to not do that .. 

    But I did still talk about her to friends or my young son's ... and slowly my siblings could talk about her .. in my head , if we stopped talking about her , wed loose her ... and i wanted to bring her with me .. now 30 odd years down the line, even my little granddaughter knows how amazing she was ... and went we see a white feather... she picks it up and says its from my mums wings .... 

    So I'd just say find a way .. put down your memories ... your thoughts ... wer all here and really understand the need to share ...  sending you a vertual hug.... Chrissie x

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    Hey, 

    I'm so sorry to hear about your dad, but I know how you feel. I lost mine on the 14th November also from cancer and as you did for yours I took care of him. I understand it's so hard trying to do all you can to try and make them feel better but you can't always do it. 
    talking to others isn't always easy either, I tend not to just because I don't really know actually, It's hard, and like you say you don't want to upset anyone but that can't always be a bad thing, it just shows how much they loved and cared for your dad and it's all part of the grieving process. I'm sorry if they're not ready to talk about him but if you are go ahead, talk to us if you like, anytime. Talking about memories and good times brings such a lovely feeling, thinking about him, talking about him, all those memories keeps him with you, he will always be with you just like mine will always be with me. 
    I also sit and think about all the things we were hoping to do or said we would and it always makes me cry but then I try to remember all the times we did have together and how much he loved all of us and would literally move mountains for us. I'm welling up just writing this! I haven't felt I can write anything down yet which is a go to for me really, I find it really helps so if you feel you can writing some memories down of you and your dad may be a way of getting your feelings and memories out in a different way. 
    you're so strong, what you did for your dad and how you are staying strong for your family. If you ever need to talk we are right here and we'll always listen and help as much as we can. We understand and if we struggle to a little we will try our best to. I'm sending you a huge hug, 

    Bex x 

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