My mum is dying. I am not sure if it is normal to be grieving even before she has died but I cannot stop crying. I feel nauseous and have panic attacks where I hyperventilate. She is 80 and I am nearly 56. I don't have children but I have a husband. I am not close to my dad or my sister and I don't think my dad will be interested in seeing me once my mother has passed. I am currently feeling that I want to go at the same time as my mum or shortly after as I cannot see the point in existing without her. Is this normal? I keep reading that you never get over the death of a loved one; you just come to terms with or accept it but what does that mean? Will I ever laugh my head off or be happy again or will I always feel sad and depressed and ache with missing my mum? I am also very upset that she is do scared of being alone and feel that going at the same time means we could go together and she would not be alone.