I'm so sorry about you losing your hubby. I understand how you feel. Have you anyone who can support you like family or friends? I know everything must seem so raw at the moment and just getting through each hour and day must be hard.
Please try and find some help from somewhere and I will be back on here very soon.
My husband died of oesophageal cancer on 30 September. He was ill for a year but it was still a huge shock. Like you, I just can't get my head around that this is forever. I keep going over the last few weeks but it is a blur. Did I sit with him enough? Did I talk to him about his feelings? I wish I had that last month again.
My dog gives me a reason to get up in the morning and I have to take him out but nothing else seems worth doing. I am lucky that my children live close but when I am alone the grief washes over me and everything feels hopeless.
Do you have children or friends to support you? A couple of hours with my grandchildren gives me a brief rest from sobbing. I am better if I keep busy. Lockdown means we spend more time on our own which is not helpful. They say that times heals - we shall see but not soon.
Good luck and I hope we both start to feel better.
