OK, my heads full of a million and one things, but I'll try and get my message across best I can.
I lost my wife on 12th July at 17.15pm. WOW. this is so hard. 3 months on, and I still can't accept she has gone.
I would just like to say to those who have lost a love one, my heart goes out to you all.
If you had your partner home for her remaining days, Again my heart goes out to you. for me,. it was a very stressful time ..
So much so being diabetic I had a couple of hypo's as the pressures of watching my wife slowly ebbing away. it must of frightened my wife, but my son and daughter helped me through. they were a tower of strength for their mum and me. I'm not going into detail on her final week, other than I was holding her hand telling her how much I loved her, as she gave out her final breath.
It was carols Birthday in October, I realised that was her first Birthday without her. then it hit me. It's going to be the first Xmas and new year without her. How do I cope. will I cope
Hey there. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, my heart goes out to you. I lost my Mum in July and it still hurts now. I expect losing your wife or husband is even more traumatic. I hope you are looking after yourself and your health. You sound like you have good family support in your kids and that will help you I'm sure. I'm sure you will find a way to cope by talking it out with people who care, and by getting support yourself if you need it.
The first birthday may be tough, but you'll get through it and you're not alone. I'm dreading Christmas for the same reason, although I have other family to lean on and take comfort from, I'll still remember Mum and will do at every other time we would normally have been together.
Try to stay strong for those kids of yours, I'm sure they are really proud of you.
So sadened to hear of you loss. I can't begin to even imagine how you must be feeling.
But please don't be so hard on yourself, 3 months is not long a long time to feel any sense of recovery or acceptance process. Your wife was your life partner and that loss will be with you always. There is no time or schedual in place to deal with somethng as major as a loss of someone so close. We are all individuals and our relationships are our very own especailly when you have had, on top of everyting else, your own health issues to deal with.
Birthdays and all celebrations will all be hard but I hope you find the strenght to see and feel that while your wife is no longer physically with you, you stil have yor children and many full memories that you can all share on these occasions.
My husband is on palliative care and each day I see a difference in him. We don't have childern togther or any support, so we are manging the best we can between us.
Covid hasn't helped. I am sure you must have felt the impact of that too as your wife pased away during the pandemic period.
I am try and keep my focus on the present as inevitable as it is I really dont want to look past it.
But enough about us. Please do take care of yourself. You have 2 amazing children and many happy moments to share with them in the future.
I have just read your post and wanted to send you my very best wishes. I was very moved by the love you have for your wife and as other posts have said this is not something you can get over in a defined period of time.
I am sure you cherrish the memories of the wonderful loving life you shared with her and hopefully the trauma of those final weeks you spent together will give way to happier memories.
I think it is good to share your thoughts on this forum because there are so many of us out here struggling through difficult times and we have a lot of empathy.
Dont keep your feelings bottled up - we are here for you.
I would like to say a big thank you to one and all for the kind words. and I hope anyone going through tough times finds it in there hearts to talk. Although it is tough and upsetting to think and talk about loved ones. it restors faith that people we don't even know have kind words. thank you all.
