Hey guys,  I'm only new to this. I recently lost my dad on the 7th of February this year. He was diagnosed with stage 4  bowel cancer  3 years ago which spread to his liver and lungs. He fought the whole 3 years for us all and he never complained once!! He was the best dad and grandad ever !!  The moment I heard the word cancer 3 years ago when he was diagnosed my life literally felt like it was falling down around me , I think I grieved since the day i was told, I could never come to terms with it. 

Now he's gone. I always imagined this day would come and I always said I'm never going to cope without him but here I am doing it and I don't know how.  some days I'm honestly so upset I can't even breathe,  god I miss him so so much the pain is unbearable sometimes what id do to give him a big hug and a kiss.  I look back on our messages we used to send to eachother and my heart literally breaks all over again. It's very hard to get my head around that I will never see him again , someone who I seen everyday for the whole 25 years of my life, I'm the "baby" of the house lol , I was his baby sorry guys I don't know much about this chat I'm just looking for people to talk to that feel the same way because I feel like I'm going mad as nobody around me knows how I feel apart from my family But sometimes I feel like it's too hard for me to talk to them about it as they are trying to cope also