I miss my Dad

We lost my Dad in December after he was diagnosed with late stage cancer... it had already spread to his bones and there was nothing they could do.
Even though I am 29 and he was 56, it still hurts every day. He was always there for me and although we occasionally butted heads, it was just because we were so alike.
My mum hurts the most (there were together since they were 16). And I want to be there for my mum but it is hard. Now with the Coronavirus she needs to self isolate because of her weak immune system, and she is all alone.
I watch these TV shows where out of nowhere 3 seasons in the Dad gets cancer and then recovers and I am angry. Because couldn't that have been my Dad? (I appreciate it is fiction)

Offline Moderator Lucie over 5 years ago

Hello Leyla123,
I am so sorry for your loss. It's normal that you are missing your dad and that you think about him on a daily basis. We have information here on coping with grief which I hope will be useful to you. With the coronavirus situation and your mum having to self isolate and being all alone, it will inevitably bring back memories and make them more vivid. If you can't actually go and see your mum in person, perhaps you could give her a call even a video call so that she can see you and talk to you? TV shows can be comforting but as you say sometimes they will remind you of an event that did happen in your life or in your particular case, where things went differently for your dad and it is normal to feel angry as a result. As you say, it's just fiction so try and distance yourself from what you see on the screen and tell yourself this was just a film and didn't happen in real life.
Best wishes,
Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator
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Offline Paulus over 5 years ago

Hi leya ye it is fiction the tv realy potrays cancer i a shamful way realy its not like that . Its a hearbeat realy since december you can help yourself with some counciling theres support groups ive lost mum and dad some years ago and my partner just under 2 years ago .yes loosing your life partner is the most difficult to come to terms with in some ways not in otheres a call first thing on a morning and last thing at night could be good for you and your mum as i find that hurts the most i suppose now it will be phone counciling but you get to talk to someone who can give you some answers as we all have questions myself after the experiences ive had after i lost my liz i dont think we ever die our bodys wear out but the energy that is us never dies we all know about energy we cant see it but we know its there your dad will be around somewhere making sure your ok we will see them again but not just yet you have a life to lead its hard now for you all but it does get easier you just have to take it as it comes till you and your mum get your emotional energy back and you will. just take it one day at a time Paul
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