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Mum’s been gone just over five weeks and I’m researching her

Amygcad
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Hi,

 

mum has has been gone just over five weeks now. She was diagnosed 11 days before she passed away. She was full of life and only 57 so it was completely unexpected.

 

I’ve just been looking at her death certificate again and want to understand more about her cause of death. It says mestatic carcinoma oesophagus. Mum also had cancer in her lungs, kidney, skin and bones. When I google carcinoma it gives the impression that caught early, this was very unlikely to have the outcome it did. I’m finding it really difficult to come to terms with this. Please be honest... is this the case? 

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    Hi so sorry about your mum this rotton disease can take you in weeks sometime we ignore pains and things i i suppose if your mun seemed fit how would they know .you can make an appointment to discuss it with the drs  .you can contact patiant leiason services there at everyhospital just ring your hospital and they will put you in touch then you fill in formss and investigate there unbiased . My partner was misdiagnosed and by the time it was to late unfortunatly we were unable to marrybecause of pensions etc so even though i cared for her throughout her many illnesses and her daughter was hopeless whe she died all my rights went i triedto get her to do something but dont dont  she did so i had no recaurse . But yiu do but if you go through some of the posts dieing quickly is quite comon after diagnosis as by the time its found and shows its metastasised everywhere . Try the liason services they will advise you what to do i cant realy help anymore only i i hope you get peace of mind over your loss either way.paul

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    Hi amy,

    I dont have any answers for you,I just wanted to say how sorry I am about your mum.its such a shock isn't it.

    My mum has been gone just over 10 weeks and was only ill for 11 days before she died too.

    Although she was older than your mum at 74, she was still full of life like her, running the house, doing the shopping and gardening and chatting away to her friends and family every day.

    I feel still in shock that she has gone and the hospital said she would be home having a cup of tea the following day expected to live a long life.

    I hope you get the answers you want.

     

    Cheryl x

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    Hi Amy,

    I am not a medical expert, but sometimes cancer has no symptoms until it's too late. It's horrible and awful but there is nothing that you could have done to prevent it or catch it. The statistics for metastatic cancer are generally not good – my Mum passed away from metastatic ovarian cancer just over a week ago, and we only found out it had spread 3 months ago. 

    I would definitely recommend talking to Macmillan, they'll be able to talk to you about what her cause of death means and hopefully stop you from agonising over research – you won't find the answer online. It's so, so unfair but there are so many resources for people like us. x

  • Offline in reply to C1971

    Hi 

    I’m so sorry for your mums loss, mine is sunniest to yours Cheryl , 11dsys after diagnosis prior to that she too was full of life. 

    Mums was secondary liver cancer , primary in her lung she was given 2 weeks and she passed away almost on 2 weeks 

    I too hope you find the answers , The weeks following mums death I questioned everything until recently I have accepted there was nothing more we could have done as it did not present itself with symptoms until very progressed.

    sending love X 

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