First of all, I am not sure if I can be of any help writing this. What’s hard during moments of loss is not just losing who you love but also losing people around you and not getting the right kind of support. Being alone in time of change, not any change but a change you are unsure of is hard but rest assured that god will always be there for you if you let yourself, your emotions, your weakness and surround yourself by his power. I am not sure if you actually believe in god, but if you do try to get closer to him try to ask him for guidance, ask him to let you open up to the right people, let him guide you through this hard time. At one point this year I have felt so weak right after my father’s diagnosis, I really felt that life has ended right there and that it will be so hard to go back to feeling close to normal anytime soon but here I am trying to show you that you will be able to cope and that you shouldn’t let anyone bring you or your emotions down, you should acknowledge the fact that you are going through a hard time and it’s only normal to feel weak, you shouldn’t feel guilty because you are not strong enough to deal with it, no one has that kind of strength to deal with it logically, it is not a logical experience, it’s an emotional one so we should deal with it with emotions. If you need to talk to someone the door is always open on my side. 

Hi this is an old post, but I wondered how you are doing? My mum is dying of lung cancer, diagnosed a week ago, I'm devastated, we are so close, I also live next door and can't imagine life without her. She can't have treatment as she is already end stage copd and on oxygen. Heartbroken