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I lost my wife to breast cancer

Jason74
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I lost my wife to breast cancer on her 44th birthday just over 3 months ago. I have 4 children who we both adored. I just can’t get over that feeling of loss and loneliness. My wife battled for 8 years having different types of chemo, radiotherapy and surgery as the cancer spread around her body and not once did she feel sorry for herself or ask why me? She lived life to the full always putting others first. The way she died was awful seeing her gasping for air and being in so much pain will never leave me. She was the bravest person I new she was my best friend and I miss her and loved her so much. Christmas has been really hard and then tonight I have just found my youngest son crying and hugging a wall that has her picture on it. I know she wouldn’t want me to be unhappy or feel sorry for myself and the kids but I do and I can’t see any future for me apart from the children as my life ended the minute hers did. I loved with everything I had and never missed an appointment or treatment we really were inseparable.

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    I'm so sorry for your loss, i hope you have lots of support around you its an awful time for you x

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    Oh, this is awful and in many ways closely mirrors what I am currently experiencing. My wife passed away at the end of November after a two and a half year battle against breast cancer which spread onto her lungs, she was 46. Her passing was also a very traumatic experience and can at best be described as like watching a fish out of water gasping for air. That experience has rocked me to the core. We have two kids aged 16 & 20 and are stuck in a very sad no mans land at the moment and not really knowing what to do for the best. Its just a horrible way to feel, our world has been smashed to pieces and we don't know what to do.

    People keep saying "stay strong for the kids", but its a struggle when I can't even be strong for myself. Its just a horrible situation to be in.

    James

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    I'm sorry for yours and your baby's loss and my heart breaks for you all.

    I have just lost my wife on the 27th.  To an unknown primary she had secondary cancer found in her lungs, after being in hospital for 4 weeks.

    She was told on Christmas Day by her self and then left for two days with out me by her side because of covid what she also caught in hospital. I got to hold her in my arms for just 3 hours before she passed away.

    She was my life and best and only friend as she said, like you my life has just stopped the only reason I'm still going is my son and two foster children we have.

    Yes I'm doing the day to day things to keep everything going but when I look over to where she should be laying next to me or I look up and see photos of her I just well up and start crying, the pain is just to much. 

    Looking on here, sadly shows me that I'm not the only one going through this. 

     

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    Hi I lost my wife to breast cancer on the22/12/2020 it's been a living nightmare ever since! My wife sounded a lot like yours  living life to the full and alway putting other people first  I was so lucky to marry my sole mate I wil love her forever I have to kids so feel your pain there to !  Little steps ever day I've been told to do to get out of this hell I'm living in 

  • Offline in reply to Chris2020

    I lost my soulmate,best friend,my absolute everything to secondary breast cancer on 28/12/21 and I'm in bits we were together for 30 years and only spent about 3 days apart we did everything together. She battled for over 2 years and got to ring the bell but it was not to be sadly she was taken in the hospice on the 24/12/21 and never came home and now I'm at a loss and don't know what hat to do I have 2 sons in there 20s and it's just unbearable I know we have to do baby steps but i Just want her back ️ ️ ️

     

  • Offline in reply to toffeeboi

    I'm so sorry for you all, trying to cope with this. You hurt so much because you loved them so very much and that hurts deeply. But it will get better. Life always does get better, if we let it.  Day by day, year by year you'll learn to cope and hopefully remembering the lovely memories will start to happen far more often and the painful ones will fade. And they wouldn't want this for you. You know that. Hug your family and heal bit by bit. You'll be stronger for it. And one day you'll find acceptance and realise you've been left behind for a reason. To live your life and be happy again. Try it for them knowing it's what they'd choose for you and be very very kind to yourselves meantime. Much love ️

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