Hi Dani7, Just read your post. My dad passed away just over a year ago and I have been exactly the same as you. Apart from tears at the moment he died, I haven't cried at all, not even felt like crying. He had Myeloma (bone marrow cancer) for 7 years and to be honest I think that I grieved for those 7 years (not crying, but had this feeling all the time of the inevitable, he was always going to die as they couldn't cure him). When he died I actually felt relief and a sense of calm. He died peacefully and unaware of what was happening and it all happened very quickly at the end. Literally the week before he'd been sat outside in the sunshine having a cuppa with us. To start with I felt confused like you. Why am I not grief stricken? But I honestly think I had been grief stricken for 7 years and feel so much better now knowing that it's all over and he's in a much better place. I also believe that we'll see each other again one day which probably also helps. I just thought I'd let you know my thoughts on this and would be interested to know whether you can relate to any of it. How long was your mum ill for? Do you think maybe you're similar to me and without realising were grieving all the time she was ill too? I hope this helps you. I also volunteered for Cruse Bereavement Care for a few years. We were trained in bereavement support and would visit people in their homes to offer support. So I understand that everyone deals with grief in different ways and there is no right way and no wrong way. If you google the stages of grief you may find you have already been through the emotions and stages of grief when your mum was alive. If you've got any questions don't hesitate to message me back. xx