Thank you Brian for your kind thoughts.  Although I have the support of my husband, mum and close friends it's nice to know there is support from others who have been through the same, thank you. My mum is obviously going through her own grief and I don't want to burden her too much with mine (as you rightly say my daughter may be doing the same with me). In some ways she is a very mature 9 year old. In her short life this is now her 4 death that she has been through, my husbands mum and my nan died 6 months apart in 2011. The 4th death was that of her beloved hamster, and he was the one she cried the most for, I think simply because he was hers and she helped  look after him. When Dad died she said 'I coped with my hamster dying by doing normal things, that's how I want to cope with Grandpops going ' . A very mature attitude and I only wish I could sometimes be like that too. 

I see from your post that you have been through a lot too. Not only are you dealing with your own battle but also the grief of losing your loved ones. My thoughts are with you and your family.

Thank you for your kind thoughts regarding my operation. At the moment my pain level is really high, I'm trying to draw strength from Dad, it's really hard but I know my pain will increase if I get myself upset. I'm looking forward to seeing my daughter when she visits after school and of course my husband and Mum when they come too.

Thank you again for being in contact Brian, take care.

Paula