After 6 years of my mum being gone I didn't think that grief would hit me so hard and at a time where things are really stressful.
I didn't get time or the chance to grieve over her after the funeral. My father had a new relationship with someone else before my mum went, I wasn't best pleased with the situation as it was kept from me and his partner (now ex) was a complete nasty piece of work. (Thankful she is ex for the past 4 years).
Anyways to cut a long story short I was basically kicked out of my fathers house when he changed the lock on the door and I had to live with my half brother (we have different dads). I stayed there for a few months whilst I finished my college course and I then moved into my dads mothers house (I don't call her my grandmother as she said some rather heartbreaking things about my mother and me). Obviously this did not go very well and I had to move back into my fathers house.
I volunteered at a chairty shop and looked for work, finally got a job and met my amazing fiancé.
Really the years just flew by but I never forgot my mum. Only now with stress at work, home and memories coming all at once I broke down.
I immensely miss my mum, especially as important events are happening in my life. I know she can't come back, grief is so hard hitting and I'm not enjoying life, As much as I would love too. Heck I'm not really excited for my birthday next week!
I'm on a waiting list for councelling and I'm off work because I feel I literally can't cope. That's why I haven't been on here for a good while because I was trying to be strong for so long that I can't do it anymore.
I do have hope though, hope that I can get back on my feet because when life knocks you down you get back up, just going to take a while to get back up again.
