My dad passed away from cancer a month ago today and none of it feels real at all. We found out he had stage 4 kidney cancer only in January. I live with my parents so I experienced everything from beginning to end. I've felt extremely numb and calm since he died which isn't like me at all, but this morning I'm feeling a bit scared about reality setting in because of the funeral. I know it's a celebration of his life and we will do him proud and memorialise all that was so amazing about him. But I'm terrified of my grief really coming to the surface because today I can't keep it locked away. I'm scared and I miss him so so much :(
