I've lost my darling Dad to this cruel disease, he only had 2 years following diagnosis of advanced cancer. I don't know how to face the rest of my life without him. He was always a rock in my life, my guidance and support through everything. I cared for him in his last weeks, ran errands for him etc alongside my sister and he was so brave, but watching him deteriorate, gradually sleep more stop talking and take his last breath In a hospice was the cruelest thing.
Because he was so good at giving advice whatever it may be I always sought his help, I suffer with anxiety and would often hassle him over things a lot that I now think really don't matter and wish I'd spent more time telling him what a great dad he was and how much of an impact he'd had on my life for the better. I told him I loved him a lot, it was the last thing I said to him whenever I phoned him or saw him - but it doesn't feel like enough now, so much more I wanted to say.
I know how much he loved me but just don't feel confident he knew it back and I miss him so much and can't say it now.
I guess I just wonder if anyone feels the same or can help me somehow.
thank you